


Give Me Some Credit

by 4vrAFangirl



Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Forced Prostitution, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Slow Burn, Suicidal Thoughts, Underage Prostitution
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-25
Updated: 2016-04-16
Packaged: 2018-04-23 07:19:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 39,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4868054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/4vrAFangirl/pseuds/4vrAFangirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Whether it was the stress the mere thought of it caused him, or that of his home-life, or some kind of biological or chemical fluke, Gary "Eggsy" Unwin is starting his last year of secondary still listed as unspecified. A freak. Probably the only 17 year old in the world that hasn't presented. But that's okay, as long as when it happens he's anything but an omega. But of course then he meets their new student-teacher for history, Mr. Hart, whose everything down to his very scent says alpha...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Please, be mindful of the tags. I don't want to spoil any of the important plot points by being over-zealous with them, but I have attempted to list any possible triggers, and will update them if I think of any more as this story progresses.
> 
> This will be an incredibly slow burn, so those of you who are here for Hartwin, bear with me it is coming. (Any non-con or underage sex in this narrative as is warned about in the tags is not taking place between Eggsy and Harry.)
> 
> Want a peek behind the scenes of writing these stories? Got a prompt or idea for a fic you'd like to see? Drop me a note on my Tumblr: [afangirlreadsfics](http://www.afangirlreadsfics.tumblr.com)

See, thing is, Eggsy isn't stupid. A late bloomer maybe, but not a fuckin' idiot. He's neither tall and dark, or conventionally handsome like all those cheap paperback romances they sell beside the tabloids in the markets. He's not weak exactly, but he knows he's better off using his speed to his advantage to avoid rather than return a punch. He's not gaunt, but one could probably make an argument for underfed. He's rough around the edges, and despite his bravado and claims that he can always snag a posh one 'cause they all love a bit 'a rough, Eggsy pushes everyone away far more often than he attracts anyone. But it's not his fault. Really it isn't. The alternative is just too... risky.

From the moment he understood the implications, all of the possible repercussions, Eggsy had prayed to whatever higher powers there might be that he'd not present as an omega. His mother, by the time he hit his teenage years all but gone on alcohol and the various drugs his stepfather supplied, was unawares, and entirely powerless to stop Dean forcing Eggsy to 'earn his keep', first running his drugs before he's even hit his double-digit years or understands what his new step-dad is making him do, then later with his body with Dean's Muppets and lackeys, and later still with strangers who picked him out off the corner of Smith street for extra money Eggsy and his mum would never see.

But this he could endure, would endure, if for no other reason than sheer spite for the contemptible bastard. He could come back to the flat and pretend enough scalding hot water from the shower would wash away all the evidence and the shame of it. If it kept Dean from doing the same to his mum, or marking her-chaining her to him as his mate, well then he'd do what he had to.

No, what he lived in absolute terror of, was presenting as an omega, of being forced into a mated relationship with one of Dean's crew, or perhaps one of the Johns who got carried away or didn't listen when he told them to stop, not to bite him.

But it didn't happen. In fact, Eggsy didn't present as anything. His classmates, peers and neighbors all underwent the change, but for some reason, whether it was the stress the mere thought of it caused him, or that of his home-life, or some kind of biological or chemical fluke, Eggsy was starting his last year of secondary still listed as unspecified. A freak.

Eggsy isn't stupid. He actually did incredibly well in primary. He showed a lot of promise in gymnastics, and he hadn't done too poorly in his studies either. But then Dean moved in, and the whole world slowly started to go to shit around him.

These days school was simply a chance to get out of the house somewhere Dean and his mates couldn't get to him for a couple of hours, but hardly worth the effort required. Nobody was expecting him to become-or any boy from the council flats for that matter- to become some kind of rocket scientist, or anything. And his teachers, while they didn't heckle or harass him, hardly knew any better than his peers what to make of Eggsy or his undetermined status. So most of them just let him sit in the back of the room stalling out the clock each day without comment.  


Eggsy was prepared to do just that for his final year of secondary as he settled into a seat by the window in his history classroom; scarcely bothering to take the name of the new teacher's aide that would be joining them this semester as their instructor introduced him, before a flurry of whispered comments from those around him finally had Eggsy looking up.

 _Christ, he was gorgeous_ , Eggsy thought aware of and fighting his body's instinctive response to drop his jaw in surprise. The man's legs alone seemed to be temptation itself, stretching on for miles. But then there was the suit- And honestly he wasn't even their teacher, much less the professor he dressed like, just an aide-a teacher in training. He didn't need to impress anyone, certainly not a classroom full of seven- and eighteen year olds. But nevertheless he was definitely making an impression, on Eggsy at the very least. The sharp, clearly tailored cut of his suit doing little to hide a lithe, fit form beneath it, his posture commanding respect and attention, and his voice washed over the room... smooth and rich like melted chocolate.

Eggsy didn't believe in that 'love at first sight' nonsense everyone seemed to eat up, but even for a man of his age, which the younger boy estimated to be somewhere around 40s, their new teacher's aide was undeniably handsome, and looking at Mr. Hart, Eggsy could already tell that he was in trouble. For one thing, everything down to his very scent when he was walking about the classroom a little while later to offer help on their assignment read alpha, and for the first time in his life since he understood what that meant, Eggsy found himself almost wishing he were an omega.

Being pampered and cared for, truly respected, rather than simply used for having an omega status, that wouldn't be so bad, would it? And the thing is Mr. Hart would be brilliant at it, Eggsy is sure, because he already is. By the end of the class the new aide seems not only to have identified him as a possibly 'difficult' student, but decided to make it his personal mission, his pet project this term to see to it he helps him, and that Eggsy succeeds and flourishes in World History. And for the first time in too many years, god help him, for some inexplicable reason, Eggsy actually wants to succeed, and to make someone-Mr. Hart- proud of him.

Praise from their new teacher's aide, Eggsy soon discovers, like so many other things about him, is absolutely addictive. Something about the fact that the man doesn't often give it, making it all the rarer and treasured to him, and has yet, as far as Eggsy can tell, ever lied to any of them. Some part of him knows of course that Mr. Hart is as mortal as the rest of them, and must have some failings or flaws, but honesty doesn't appear to be one of them. And after all the years he's been manipulated and lied to, Eggsy rather enjoys and appreciates how direct and no-nonsense the other is. So when Mr. Hart tells him he was impressed and enjoyed reading the essay he submitted about Britain's key players in the First World War, Eggsy finds he has to fight like hell to avoid a full body blush.

As it is his pants seem to fit just a little less comfortably after the exchange, and that's a new and interesting development... Because who ‘woulda thought it, but turns out an old bloke named Herbert Asquith, and Winston Churchill may have just helped Eggsy into a stunning and altogether frightening realization posthumously. That Mr. Hart isn't just conventionally or objectively handsome anymore. In the span of a few weeks he's become incredibly attractive to the younger man he seems to have taken under his wing and tutelage. And Eggsy's just fucked, ain't he? Because he knows what's coming next as sure as he knows that strange brown shite the cafeteria lady just doled out onto his tray is probably inedible.  


And Eggsy can't afford to fall for Mr. Hart. For one thing, he's just an aide, just getting his hours in so he can get certified to teach history in his own classroom, and that don't necessarily mean he will stay on here. For another he's a bleedin' teacher. Or near enough at least to be completely off-limits. More importantly though, much as he doesn't want to think about it, offering him extra help with his work doesn't mean Mr. Hart is interested in anything more than seeing Eggsy achieve better marks.

It certainly doesn't mean that he wants him, and why should he? He'll want a proper, probably a posh omega, and Eggsy, well he's broken, not to mention used goods. He’d have to be off his rocker... So Eggsy does his best to push the whole idea and any errant thoughts about Mr. Hart out of his mind.

Except for some damnable and infuriating reason he can't. Mr. Hart is everything that Eggsy has never had, or at least been without for so long he can't remember anything else. He's kind, reliable, safe, a constant presence in his day to day life that actually brings him some modicum of happiness. And somewhere in the back of his mind, though he doesn't like to dwell on it, Eggsy knows he won't be around forever. Knowing that, it seems wrong to scold himself for thinking about and enjoying the older man's company while he has it. By winter break Mr. Hart will have completed the hours required hours of him and likely be kept busy and away much of the spring term finishing his certification.

Eggsy isn't stupid, but he might just be where Mr. Hart is concerned, because it doesn't take long before he's inventing reasons for needing extra help, or finding new reasons to get personal attention and one-on-one time with their teacher's aide. It's going to make it that much harder when he leaves, Eggsy knows, but he really can't bring himself to stop. If anything, whatever it is that started for him when he first laid eyes on him, it's getting worse as time goes on.

It's not actually on purpose the first time that it happens. He's well aware of his bodily reactions to the assistant instructor, of course, having had to hide some of those that cropped up at incredibly inopportune times. Eggsy likes to think he showed an impressive amount of restraint resisting the urge to do anything about it those rare occasions he's afforded the time and privacy. Of course, that means he hasn't gotten off in nearly two months, because he doesn't trust himself to jerk off without thinking about the older man. Still...

He's been with Johns since then, but even before, none of them have ever cared if he enjoyed it. Some of them liked it better if he didn't, even try to make sure of it. Tonight's customer is one of those. Eggsy does his best with most of them to imagine he's somewhere else. A sharp thrust, a little too deep and far too dry makes him bite his lip so hard it bleeds. His hands slip against the rough surface of the brick wall he's braced up against, as the man behind him tugs painfully at his hair, and suddenly Eggsy is a million miles away.

He thinks about the way that he wants to be touched; the idea of lovemaking, instead of a quick and hard fuck with a stranger in some dark alley. Tender instead of rough, aiming to please, to worship rather than hurt. Somewhere warm, comfortable, maybe spread out on a proper, soft bed instead of scratchy sheets at the nearby motel that smell like mothballs some of the men opt for. Someone who actually cares about him not just getting off. Someone to whisper his name, sweet nothings and promises. Someone whose voice sounds incredibly like Mr. Hart, and once that image is there; he can't get rid of it. Not even after the man finishes and tosses his payment on the asphalt beside him while Eggsy is still righting his clothes.

Later that evening when his mother's asleep and Dean's gone out, while categorizing his newest scrapes and bruises in front of the mirror as he peels his clothes off and drops into the hot bath, he gives in wrapping a soft, but firm hand around himself. 

He wants to feel good. To feel loved, just once, and for the time spent in exquisite moments of build-up and tumbling over the precipice he does; before reality crashes back down on him entirely too quickly in the form of a sharp ache in his backside: a reminder of earlier that evening, of one of many reasons why Mr. Hart will never want, or ever touch him the way he's just imagined. Eggsy dunks himself under the still piping hot water, closing his eyes, and for a moment considers never resurfacing.

In the end he does. Eggsy tells himself it's because he doesn't want to give Dean the satisfaction, even though it's probably fear. He could say it was on account of his mum, but she's so far gone these days who's to say if she would notice. Eggsy simply doesn't possess the guts to go through with it. He wonders briefly if it still counts as being suicidal if you can't take your own life, but you wouldn't mind laying down in the middle of the street and letting the next car or cab do it for you. He wonders if Mr. Hart would miss him...

He would, it seems, because that's just the kind of man that he is. And he notices the little things, like the bruises that the cover-up didn't quite manage to disguise under the harsh florescent lighting of the classroom. Eggsy knows as soon as the older man asks to speak to him after class what it must be about, because he knows he did a shite job with the foundation after P.E., but he'd run out of the product before he'd finished reapplying it. Nobody has ever bothered to ask before. Though whether that's because they didn't notice, or didn't know how or want to, Eggsy couldn't say. But as a result he really hasn't got any sort of good story or a lie thought up, having never had the occasion to need one before, but he can't tell Mr. Hart no, not when he's so concerned and earnest in his request.

Of course that's part of the reason that Eggsy's in love with him. And fuck, that's what this is, what Eggsy has been trying so hard to ignore and pretend is anything else. He's falling for him. Hard and fast. _Christ, he doesn't even know his first name. That's something you really ought to know about the person you're mad for, innit?_ He should find out. He supposes Mr. Hart might actually tell him if he was to ask, but he can't really think of a good excuse or reason to. Maybe some reconnaissance instead... And Eggsy is so distracted trying to concoct a plan, it's too late when he realizes the bell rang two minutes ago and the older man is approaching him for that chat he asked about.

"Mr. Hart," Eggsy greets with a nervous nod of acknowledgement.

"Mr. Unwin," he returns with a small and encouraging smile, and Eggsy's heart flutters just a little at the sight of it and the address. And who would have thunk that could happen from something as simple as being addressed by his last name, but when Mr. Hart says it... it isn't condescending like his other teachers. It's just proper, respectful, makes him feel like a gentleman and equal, even if he couldn't be farther from the sort of posh that the older man is.

For a moment Mr. Hart's confident demeanor seems to slip, ever so slightly while he considers Eggsy eyes drifting over the poorly-concealed bruises and scrapes while he tries to think of what to say, or how to begin.

"Eggsy," he begins gently, and the concern in his voice is going to be the younger man's undoing. He's preparing himself for an interrogation when the older man finally asks, "Are you alright?" And yeah, Eggsy hadn't really been expecting that, though Mr. Hart being the sort of man that he is, he really should have been.

" 'm fine," he responds automatically, perhaps a little too quickly for the other to believe him. Or maybe Eggsy's just always been a terrible liar, it's not as if his mum it any of Dean's mates are all that observant.

There's a moment where the pair of them simply stare at each other, while Eggsy waits with bated breath because they both know he's lying, and they both know what it means.

"It's alright," Eggsy nods finally. "I know you gotta say somethin' about it to someone," he says, with as much acceptance in his voice as forgiveness.

"It won't help will it," Mr. Hart asks, eyes looking sadder than Eggsy's ever seen them.

 _No, it won't. In fact it'll likely make it worse, because if Dean has to clean their place up and play nice with a social worker just coming by to 'follow up' that means at least one day he's out money from peddling his various drugs. Somebody has to pay the price for that, and it's well established by now it'll be Eggsy._ But he doesn't want to tell the older man that, he has to report it. He could lose his job, the possibility of becoming a teacher if he doesn't, and Eggsy doesn't want to make him feel bad for worrying about him-it's nice to feel like someone notices and cares. "You wouldn't be the first to report it, but it's okay. You have'ta," he replies finally with a small sort of shrug.

Mr. Hart seems to consider this for a moment before grabbing Eggsy's phone from the desk and tapping some keys before handing it back to him. It's a new contact.

 _Harry_ , Eggsy registers fighting a completely out of place smile as he stares at the new entry in his phone. _Harry Hart. Mr. Hart's first name is Harry. It suits him,_ he thinks, a small spark of pleasure, happiness in knowing a secret even one as small as the other's first name fills him as Eggsy forces himself to focus back in on what Mr. H- what Harry is saying to him.

"If you think of something I can do that will actually be of help, or just need someone to talk to," he offers by way of explanation.  
Eggsy thinks about telling him to call the cops on his step-dad, but his mum doesn't have a job or a cent to her name, she could be out on the street if she isn't arrested herself. Instead he pockets the phone, shaking his head.

"Thanks, but you didn't have to. You don't wanna hear about the crap after-school special I'm livin' in."

"No," Harry replies honestly with a frown. _And yeah, Eggsy knew it._ "No I don't. You're too bright and have too much potential for me to want to hear about you not being appreciated, or made to suffer for it. But that doesn't mean I won't listen though, if that would be of use to you, everyone should have somebody to talk to." And Eggsy wasn't expecting that. Not at all, and it takes a minute for him to even fully process what it is that he's just heard.

"I ain't that bright," he contradicts quietly, even as he feels a slight flush developing and traveling up the back of his neck to the tips of his ears, because Harry has got to be just being kind saying things like that about him, since they certainly aren't true.

"Yes you are," Harry replies without a moment's hesitation and sounding as sure of it as he is about, well anything else. "You might just be the smartest young man I've ever had the pleasure to know, you've just been discouraged from showing or further developing that part of yourself. But you don't have to pretend to be stupid, you don't have to live and die here in council flats just because it's where you come from or because your mother might. You have the power and potential to be anything that you want to be Eggsy," the older man continues, and Eggsy snorts softly, shaking his head.

"Now you sound like one of them motivational posters with some cute animal on 'em in a primary classroom," Eggsy says, and Harry laughs, _actually laughs_ , and Eggsy can't remember ever hearing him do so before, but now he has he can hardly think of anything he enjoys hearing more. He wishes he could always make Harry smile and laugh like this.

"I suppose that did get away from me a bit, but the point still stands," Harry replies. "You can be so much more than anyone, perhaps even you have let yourself believe. The only question you have to ask yourself is what is it that you want?" 

**_I want you._** It's immediate, maybe instinctual the way that answer comes to him, and Eggsy knows that isn't what Harry was asking him, he knows the real answer to that question will probably be more complicated and require more thought, but the fact that this is a simple and knee-jerk response doesn't make it any less true for coming without thought, it's certainly not a new idea to him, nor something he's not considered well before now. _So, what about yours,_ Eggsy thinks, _can I be yours?_ For one terrifying moment he is sure that the emotions and desires that are welling up within him must be plain as day to the man opposite him, but no, they must not be, because the only thing that follows is an entirely unremarkable silence between them.

"Think about it," Harry urges kindly, one hand gently reaching out to clasp his shoulder in a gesture of reassurance and patience. "I would be happy to help you any way that I can," the older man assures him, before the pair of them part going their separate ways for the evening.

Eggsy thinks about it, poking gently at one of the not yet fully formed bruises Dean has given him for bringing the social services down on them again, playing back the conversation in his mind behind closed eyes. Harry thought he was bright, that he had potential, that he could do anything he wanted, that he could get out of a rotten place like this, and Harry had never once lied to him. The thought made his entire body tingle with warmth, completely distinct from any sort of arousal (although thinking about Harry for any great length of time usually came with that as well sooner or later) in a way he wasn't altogether familiar with, but could certainly get used to.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, be mindful of the tags. I don't want to spoil any of the important plot points by being over-zealous with them, but I have attempted to list any possible triggers, and will update them if I think of any more as this story progresses.
> 
> This will be an incredibly slow burn, so those of you who are here for Hartwin, bear with me it is coming. (Any non-con or underage sex in this narrative as is warned about in the tags is not taking place between Eggsy and Harry.)
> 
> Want a peek behind the scenes of writing these stories? Got a prompt or idea for a fic you'd like to see? Drop me a note on my Tumblr: [afangirlreadsfics](http://www.afangirlreadsfics.tumblr.com)

Eggsy does his best both to consider what it is that Harry told him about his potential and what it is he wants for his future, and to avoid asking for the older man's help. It isn't so much that he doesn't trust, or want the Harry's advice, as it is that he probably wants it a little too much for his own good. He's probably too far gone on him as it is, but spending any more time with his his history class' aide can't be a good idea. Eggsy isn't exactly known for his self-preservation skills, but he is doing the best he can in this case to make an exception. But Harry isn't about to let the matter slide, just because Eggsy is uncertain about possible future careers. Dean certainly has some ideas, and while Eggsy had never particularly liked them, truth be told he hasn't really dreamed about or aspired to much greater heights before now, in part because he never truly believed he could make it.

Of course, that's not to say that somehow learned to overcome all of his insecurities about himself and his upbringing because of one conversation with his would-be mentor. But for the first time in a very long time, Eggsy has someone who believes in him, who genuinely wants the best and to see him succeed without any sinister or selfish ulterior motive. Even if there are moments when he finds he doubts himself, still stronger is the desire to do anything not to let Harry down, to prove he hasn't made an error in judgement. So when Harry suggests that he stay after school to take some career assessments, he can't find it in him to tell him no.

Turns out Eggsy has a great deal of aptitude in a number of subjects leading to all kinds of varied suggestions for careers, which to be honest is nice because maybe it's not just Harry being nice, but also terrifying and distinctly unhelpful in finding a direction for himself. Harry is quick to assure him that it's absolutely normal to be unsure or even anxious about it all, but the Eggsy can't really be entirely comforted by it. Harry doesn't have all the facts or the full story in front of him; he doesn't know what sorts of extracurricular activities his stepfather has had him doing for years now. And yeah, sure, all these possibilities they sound great, until Eggsy gets to thinking about them, and remembers why it is he's never truly allowed himself to want anything-because he will never be allowed to keep it. As soon as he settles himself into any of these suggested fields, somehow, someday, somebody is going to find out about him peddling drugs for Dean, or selling himself on the corner of Smith street. Not that any of that was his choice, but when has that ever made any difference for him? Dean was never going to let him go, would never allow his top earner to choose a different kind of life for himself.

So Eggsy does what by now had become a kind of second nature. He lies, and tries his best not to hate himself for doing so. He selects a few possibilities from his aptitude and career assessments and promises Harry to look into them over the course of their winter holiday break so Harry can help start him applying for schools when they return in January. Eggsy doesn't ask when it is that Harry is going to find the time to help him with all of this, with the older man finishing up the last of his own studies and no doubt spending increasingly less time in their classroom come the new term. Truthfully, he isn't sure he wants to know, afraid to confirm what he already knows, what some part of him has always known, that eventually he's going to lose him.

Eggsy thinks that he's done pretty well resisting the temptation to do anything about the newest number in his mobile's directory. Sure, he's toyed with the idea of calling Harry or something more times than he can count, but he's always been able to stop himself before pressing that all-important send button. Until now. Eggsy had always thought his biggest struggle would be not contacting the older man after Dean had a go at him, but that's never actually been the case. As much as that might have been what Harry originally intended in giving him his number, and as comforting and soothing as Eggsy is sure the older man's company might be, the fear of Harry seeing him in such a state was enough to override the impulse.

No, in the end Dean doesn't actually have anything to do with it. In fact, his stepfather is not even in the house in fact when Eggsy's self-control gives, Eggsy just can't handle the quickly overwhelming sensation of just how alone he is and feels right now. Harry picks up in two rings, and Eggsy isn't sure if it's the promptness, or the concerned tone when he answers that utterly disarms him, making him forget just what exactly it was he had been thinking about saying to the man, but for a moment his tongue and throat seem to have swelled up and are threatening to choke him.

"Eggsy," Harry repeats again, drawing the younger man back to himself. "Are you alright? What's wrong?"

"I'm an alpha," Eggsy manages hoarsely, as if this explains everything about why his world is falling apart. Why he's finally using this telephone number after all these months of having had it, biting back more tears, which someone as observant as Harry would no doubt be able to hear, even over the phone.

It ought to be a good thing. This is what he'd wanted all along, isn't it? _Anything but an omega_ , that had been the prayer, his desperate hope for the day he finally presented. And an alpha? Well then he just might stand a chance standing up to his stepfather and his goons. But it didn't really feel like something to celebrate or be grateful for like it once had. He was an alpha. Which meant now he really didn't have any chance of being with Harry. _Not that he ever had before,_ but before he had presented... _well some small part of him could dream._ Now the dream was shattered, lay on the ground battered, bruised and bleeding out.

"You presented," Harry replied softly, full of all the patience and understanding that Eggsy was turning into a complete sucker for. Christ, why the fuckin' hell did he think calling Harry was going to do him any good, it was only making all of this, all the more painful. "Are you okay," the older man repeated concerned, clearly not letting the question go simply because Eggsy had not yet answered him. "What do you need, how can I help you?"

Eggsy felt as though he was swallowing his tongue when he tried to swallow back down the lump forming in his throat. "I... I dunno," he admits finally, more than a little embarrassed now that he's bothering Harry with something as silly as this. "I'm sorry Mr. Hart, I'll just..."

"Eggsy, don't hang up," Harry interrupts before he can say it, making his finger freeze mid-movement over the power button. "Please," he adds thoughtfully. "Please don't hang up. It's alright," he promises. "Where are you?"

"-'m at home," Eggsy mumbles, still more than a little embarrassed.

"Alone," he asks perceptively. Eggsy eyes his mother passed out, prone body sprawled across the couch, and decides it's not dishonest to reply in the affirmative. 

"Eggsy," Harry hesitates for a fraction of a second later. "Nobody should have to be alone at a time like that-" Eggsy isn't stupid, he can hear the 'but' before the older man even manages to say it.

"S'okay Mr. Hart, I don't really know why I called 'ya, I just..."

"Eggsy," Harry interrupts before he can get too much traction with this train of thought or think about hanging up. "Let me finish, please."

"Yeah a'ight, sorry," Eggsy manages blushing a little. Even over the phone Harry's somehow authoritative enough for him to recognize him as the stronger, more dominate force of the two of them, and submit without contest. _Some alpha he is,_ if he bows down to his stepfather's wishes this easily he's not sure what could possibly be so great about being an alpha.

"Eggsy I'm out of town at the moment," Harry offers when he resumes his earlier thought. "I'm so sorry," he apologizes, sounding surprisingly sincere. "You really shouldn't be alone, but at the very least you need to be somewhere safe, somewhere you can settle into this unchallenged. -the person who gives you those bruises," he hedges, and Eggsy doesn't bother to correct that the ones Harry has been privy to are from his late-night clients, clearly the older man is thinking of Dean. "-They're an alpha," Harry asks.

"Yea', he is," Eggsy confirms, and a right piece a' work, he thinks darkly.

Harry didn't need to say it, Eggsy might be perhaps the latest bloomer ever, but he sat through the same sexual education classes everyone else did. If Dean saw him as insubordinate and enough of a threat to his authority he'd put him down, and given that he wasn't pullin' no punches to begin with, knowing his step-son was an alpha too? _He might just kill him._

"I'll make myself scarce," Eggsy assures him.

"Where will you go?"

"Dunno, but I'll figure it out, won't I," Eggsy replies, trying his best to sound unconcerned, which is evidentially the wrong approach, because he can feel Harry's discomfort filling the silence that follows.

So he takes down the address that Harry dictates to him without argument, figuring it's probably a shelter or something where he can hide out from his stepfather and his mates for a bit, that is until Harry starts talking about a keypad and a code to get him inside.

"H-"Eggsy begins almost using the older man's first name, which since he's learned it has been the only name he uses when he's thinking about him. He's quick to correct the slip and is pretty sure, Harry didn't notice though. "Mr. Hart, whose home is this?"

"Mine," the man replies simply.

"Right, of course, your place... Are you mental, bruv?"

"Perhaps," Harry replies sounding completely unconcerned about the whole thing. "Although if it's all the same to you, Eggsy, I'd appreciate it if you refrain from calling me 'bruv' ever again. Just a matter of personal preference."

"So whot? You're just givin' me the keys to your kingdom when you ain't even gonna be there? 'ow do you know I won't steal all your valuables and bugger off?"

"Well first of all unless you don't plan to return next term and graduate, which would be frankly speaking an unbelievable fucking waste," Harry replies patiently, while Eggsy tries not to gape at the other man swearing even though logically he knows Harry can't actually see him do so over the phone. "I know where you'll be come January." 

"Besides I could just look up where you live in your school records if I really wanted to, but more to the point while I'm sure there are a few things that might fetch you a little money, I don't believe that you would do that to me Eggsy. Now maybe that makes me a fool, but you are in dire straights. You need a safe place to lay low for a few days, and I'm willing to take that risk."

"Bloody hell mate, you got any idea how creepy and stalker-like that sounds? You're mad, b- Mr. Hart," and the older man does seems to notice this almost slip up if his soft chuckle is any indication. "But I ain't goin' to try and make you see sense of you're offerin' me someplace else to stay for a bit," Eggsy replies shaking his head as he writes down directions and the code Harry has dictated to him.

……………………………………

"It's a cover Galahad," Merlin reminds him with a heavy and exasperated-sounding sigh as soon as their connection is established. 

"I know that," Harry confirms. The tech-guru offers up a sort of hum in response that doesn't sound entirely convinced, but doesn't challenge him on his assertion.

"Aye, maybe you do, but your boy doesn't."

"What are you talking about?"

"You know perfectly well what I'm talking about, Harry. There are probably hundreds of boys and girls in that school with stories just as sad as Mr. Unwin's, it's improper for an instructor to focus so much on one in particular."

"Nonsense, every parent or teacher has a favorite, whether they admit to it or not."

"Is that what he is then, your favorite," Merlin asks, although his tone seems to ask an entirely different question, before he finally deigns to ask it out loud. "Is that all he is, Galahad?"

"Did you know," Harry snaps irritatedly, not answering the other man's inquiry. "When you were establishing my cover, and putting all of this in place, did you know Lee's son was attending here?"

"We did, and if there had been anyone else or a better-suited candidate for the task at hand, I would be talking to them. But it doesn't matter, it had to be you and the job needed done. Still needs done, which is why you cannot afford to let yourself become too distracted by this boy. This isn't about him."

"Eggsy," Harry corrects, with a note of annoyance in his voice, before he can stop himself or think too much about it. " 'The boy' prefers to be called Eggsy." Merlin sighs again.

"Don't do this to yourself, Harry," and it's a mark of how serious and concerned his friend is that he's using his actual name over a comm, although they both know as it's Merlin's network he's more than making certain it's entirely secure from outside ears. "You're only in this post and Eggsy's life until we gather enough information to determine who is the head of the snake in this operation. He may be in his final year, but he's still just a kid. He won't thank you for being another in a long line of people who eventually disappoints and leaves him."

"Maybe I won't have to- I could..."

"You know how this job works, perhaps better than most," Merlin replies, although his voice sounds a bit more patient, kinder now than it has been up to this point. "You are dangerously close to making him and yourself promises you won't be able to keep."

"He deserves better, Merlin."

"Ay, that he does, but that doesn't mean you're the one to give him that. We make a vow as knights to consider and act for the greater good of all, not our chosen few. Do you have any idea what kind of risk it is you're taking by letting him into your house? He's a delinquent teenage boy, what if he gets bored and starts poking around while you aren't there to stop him."

"He's not going to find or get into anything that would compromise me or Kingsmen."

"Can you really be sure of that?"

"I wouldn't have given him the pass code if I wasn't. How Long have you and Arthur been trying to hack my personal feeds for?" Merlin sighs heavily.

"Fine. Fine. But you know Lee's boy or no, you'll have a to dart him if he sees or learns to much, we can't risk this operation because you've developed a soft spot for him."

"Understood."


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, be mindful of the tags. I don't want to spoil any of the important plot points by being over-zealous with them, but I have attempted to list any possible triggers, and will update them if I think of any more as this story progresses.
> 
> This will be an incredibly slow burn, so those of you who are here for Hartwin, bear with me it is coming. (Any non-con or underage sex in this narrative as is warned about in the tags is not taking place between Eggsy and Harry.)
> 
> Want a peek behind the scenes of writing these stories? Got a prompt or idea for a fic you'd like to see? Drop me a note on my Tumblr: [afangirlreadsfics](http://www.afangirlreadsfics.tumblr.com)

Harry Hart is the first and only omega that Kingsmen has ever employed. Admittedly this is because Kingsmen doesn't actually allow omegas in their organization. They want Alphas, they'll settle for Betas in a pinch, but omegas need not apply.

Nevertheless Harry has served them as a quite efficient and unflinchingly loyal Galahad for decades now. And if he can't take pride in his status, well that he's managed to keep it hidden under the noses of some of the world's greatest spies for going on 30 years now is pretty damn impressive too.

It was never something that Harry was forced to keep secret before he had joined the organization, or anything he was ever made to feel ashamed of. His mother, a strong omega in her own right, had certainly not raised him to think like that, even if much of the world still did. And Harry supposed that there were other organizations who might have taken him on, but he wanted to be a gentleman, a Kingsmen like his father was before him, and that meant he had to be an alpha, or at least make a convincing show of it.

Of course he wouldn't have been able to do so without Merlin's help. Merlin who had worked it out a few weeks into training, but said nothing and told not a soul. Merlin, who has somehow insured over the span of decades of missions that Harry doesn't get the honeypot missions that would require him to pop a non-existent knot. Merlin, who has always made sure that he has enough suppressants and a cologne which doubles to disguise his scent... _Merlin is a godsend, is the point, really._

It's occurred to Harry of course that his life could perhaps be a lot simpler if he and the technical genius and primary handler of operations at Kingsmen were mates. Merlin already knows about his status, he doesn't think any less of him for being an omega; if anything he respects him more for it. Merlin has more than proven his loyalty to him... And Merlin isn't unattractive- at the very least, the thought of a regular partner to ease his heats, although they are reducing in urgency and frequency as years pass, would be nice. Harry has always dreamed of a mate, despite a nagging inner voice that scolds this is simply his biological clock or some overly romantic weakness on his part. But a trial run some many years gone now had lead to the discovery they made far better friends than anything else, and Merlin generally preferred women.

When a heat was absolutely unavoidable Harry took a few days off to work his way through it, sometimes calling a service when he had been younger, but these days often working through them himself. It wasn't nearly as satisfying, working himself open and over with various toys, but it didn't leave him feeling quite so pathetic for having a lighter wallet and an empty bed afterwards. 

He knew at his age, he wasn't likely to find or attract the sort of mate he'd dreamed of having when he was young. Sure, he could clean up nice, kept himself trim and fit, but he was well passed his prime child-bearing years, and more than a little marked up from the sort of job and life he lead. Besides he had more or less made this decision, this sacrifice when he chose to join Kingsmen, so he had best learn to live with it; and if his life was a little lonely at times (most of the time), well there was at least some solace in the fact he had at least done something good with it.

So when Eggsy called him about having finally presented, his status no longer undetermined, but now-an alpha, though the older man did desperately wish he could be there to look after and protect him it was probably just as well he was out of town on a small side mission trailing one of their targets while they appeared to be on winter holiday. A brand new alpha would hardly be fooled by suppressants and cologne no matter how good they might be. As it was, inviting Eggsy to his home had been far more of a spur of the moment thought than he had let on with Merlin. He was confident he had sufficiently secured and hidden away anything that might lead the young man to Kingsmen, but there were plenty of other incriminating things Eggsy might come across if he happened to decide to explore the place.

Which of course, he did. _He shouldn't,_ Eggsy thought hesitating, one hand on the doorknob. It was a completely unexpected kindness, and a great show of trust that Harry had let Eggsy into his home, particularly while he was away. He should respect that, resist the urge to snoop. But Harry wasn't here. Eggsy might never have another, or a better opportunity to do so. Besides Eggsy had never been all that good at listening to the angel on his shoulder lately, not until he'd met Harry anyway. He was curious. For all that he felt and was drawn to the older man, seeing all the shadow boxes of butterflies on the walls when he'd entered the dwelling made him realize, he didn't actually know much about Harry. Not as much as he would like to, at least. Eggsy was insatiable, wanted to know it all. Sure he'd found the guest room Harry had described alright, but the lure of the master just across the hall had been beckoning him since his arrival, and Eggsy was now powerless to resist.

The door swung open, and Eggsy had barely stepped across the threshold when he froze in his tracks. The room was neat, it's decor much the same as the rest of the house- a bit antique looking, but sturdy and warm somehow nonetheless. A large four poster with some darkening curtains stood against the far wall, the sheets, comforter and pillows all neatly in their place, a walk-in closet was ajar revealing dozens of suits, ties, dress shirts, and polished shoes Eggsy would definitely have to inspect later. Another door, this one closed, which he guessed probably opened to a bathroom. The soft glow of the street lamps on the street outside filtered in through a large window and sheer curtains. But it was what an entirely different one of his senses was picking up that stopped him.

The room smelled like much of the scents Eggsy had come to associate with the older man, but something else too. The bedroom smelled of an omega. Almost overwhelmingly so to the new alpha, and Eggsy's heart sank just a little more. Countless times Eggsy had done his best to remind himself of all the reasons why Harry wasn't ever going to think twice about or see him the way that he often did with the man. Now that he was an alpha the chances had seemed impossibly more remote. Harry hadn't warned him about any other occupant to the house, or having a mate of any sort. But he didn't seem the sort to have the kind of intimacy required for another person to scent his bedroom casually. It really wasn't any of his business, but Eggsy couldn't help it. He turned away from the bedroom pulling the door closed behind him and began to search the house in earnest for any sort of photos of the man's significant other.

 _Nothing._ Not one damn clue as to who the omega who'd snared Harry Hart's, well heart, might be, although the stuffed dog in the bathroom had very nearly scared the shit out of him. Perhaps that was his intended purpose for being there, the young man mused shaking his head. _Fuckin' strange, Guv, _Eggsy thought. _And who named their dog Mr. Pickle?!?___

He was just going to have to face it. He'd checked everywhere else in the house. The only place he hadn't thoroughly inspected, the only way he might learn anything more about his crush' mystery lover was if he went back into the master bedroom again and poked around. It was upon entering the master a second time that he finally realized why the whole thing was throwing him off balance. The bedroom smelled of Harry and an omega, but there was very little suggestion of an alpha's presence when Eggsy scented the air once more, certain not as much as might be normal or expected, even if Harry has been away for some days... Harry always carried with him a distinctive and noticeably alpha scent. It didn't make any sense that his house as a whole, particularly the room where he slept, wouldn't as well. Unless... 

After exploring just about everywhere else in the house, Eggsy couldn't have said what it was that had him hesitating in searching the older man's medicine cabinet. His bookshelves, his fridge, the locked liquor cabinet-which he was sure he could pick if he chose to set his mind to it- that was one thing, but if the perplexing perfume of the house and bedroom meant what he was beginning to think it might, what he would find the cabinet would be intensely personal, and change everything. 

Eggsy wanted to resist, really he did, Harry wouldn't have been so rude as to snoop through someone else's house he was sure. It wasn't the sort of thing a gentleman did, and Harry was nothing if not a gentleman. Eggsy was still learning, still trying to become more like the sort of man Harry was, that he could be proud of. He just wasn't quite there yet, so after some thought, he opened the cabinet, and he has his answer. There weren't any photographs of a lover in the house, no strong presence of a scent to indicate an alpha lived here, because there wasn't an alpha living in this home. Alpha's didn't have any need for suppressants, or cologne that made someone smell like an alpha. Harry was an omega.

_Harry Hart was an omega!_

Suddenly his status didn't seem like such a terrible thing as it had when he had first called the older man, utterly crushed at the idea of not being able to be what Harry might want or would need from a partner. _He was an alpha!_ And maybe, _just maybe,_ he could be _Harry's_ alpha.

It was utterly ridiculous of course, to think that perhaps Eggsy's chances are any better now than they had been a few hours ago. All of the reasons that had made the idea of the two of them an impossibility before were still there, but the young man couldn't have stopped his heart from skipping hopefully, and racing now if he tried. Thoughts of just about anything else seemed far away, and Eggsy himself felt lighter than air. He explored the house all over again with a newfound curiosity and insatiable desire to better understand the enigma that was Harry Hart. 

……………………………………

"So why are you pretendin' to be an alpha, guv?" _Smooth Eggsy, real smooth,_ he thinks mentally kicking himself, because of all the things he wanted- everything he practiced saying- for when Harry arrived back home again and inevitably booted him out from under his roof, he genuinely hadn't meant to confront him about his status. Not just yet at least, and certainly not like this. Apart from seeming accusatory, he was for all intents and purposes incriminating himself and admitting to snooping around in the older man's absence. Somehow though, and Eggsy can't for the life of him figure out why, Harry looks for the briefest of moments just a bit relieved. And then the expression is gone just as quickly and Eggsy thinks perhaps he imagined it being there in the first place, because honestly what else could he possibly have expected or feared the young, newly confirmed alpha to interrogate him about?

Now he's gone ahead and blurted out what has been bothering him since discovering the contents of his medicine cabinet though, Eggsy supposes he might as well continue, maybe he can pass it off as a well-thought out inquiry, rather than just social awkwardness or impulse.

"Is that just 'cuz you think the students won't respect ya? Cuz you know fuck 'em, there ain't a law against it anymore- omegas are allowed to have any sorta jobs they want in the public sector. You don't have to be an alpha to teach."

When Harry doesn't immediately say anything, Eggsy continues. "I mean, I did wonder how it was you were gonna divine when it was safe to be around a new alpha an' all.." Harry frowns a little at this, before finally bringing himself to speak.

"I'm sorry Eggsy, I know you must have thought I might be a kind of mentor to help you through all this. I didn't mean to give you any false hope, I just wanted to be sure you had someplace safe to stay until you had settled. But as far as I'm concerned nothing's changed; I still want to help you and be here for you, if you want and will accept my help."

 _Nothing's changed? **Everything** has changed as far as Eggsy is concerned. _ But now isn't really the time or the place to say so. And yeah maybe he had let his mouth get ahead of himself earlier, but he had enough sense and self-preservation to hold his tongue here, at least for now.

"Are you mad? 'Course I still want your help," he nods emphatically, because really how could he turn him down, even if he wasn't as far gone for him as he is? _You're one of the only people I trust_ , Eggsy thinks. Harry looks just a tiny bit and for the most fleeting of instants: relieved, which only endears him to the young alpha even more- that he had at least considered being rejected a strong possibility. _Anybody that would reject you is barking_ , the boy thinks as Harry smiles softly.

He's all the more convinced of that conviction when Harry surprises him and doesn't immediately turn him out of his house just because he's home again. "It's not really proper for you to continue to stay here with me now I'm back," he admits softly somewhere between guilt, and what Eggsy hopes and chooses to interpret as regret. "As an aide for your class, I'm in a position of authority, some could see it as an abuse of power, or taking advantage of you."

"That's crazy tho', you ain't done nothin' wrong," Eggsy protests.

"I would prefer not to turn you out on an empty stomach," Harry adds thoughtfully. "Have you eaten already?"

"See, how could you be doing anything improper? You're like a bloody saint. You got me outta the house away from my step-da' so he don't try to challenge me when I first presented, prob'ly saved my life there, and you ain't asked a bloody thing of me." Harry frowns again although Eggsy's pretty sure it's for his home-life situation and not Eggsy himself. It takes a moment for him to realize what it is he's just unwittingly revealed to the older man; fingering the man responsible for his bruises and abuses although he's sure Harry already knew, he's not the least bit stupid. Not that Mr. Hart knows the half of it, but that's okay. Eggsy will do anything to keep it that way. Besides maybe now he's an alpha he won't have the same appeal, maybe Dean will stop making him stand and look pretty out on street corners... Harry makes him feel like he can hope for things like that in a way he hasn't in years.

So even as he's going home that evening it's hard to be sad about it with a stomach full of frankly incredible home-cooked food, and his heart and chest filled with happiness and hope. He might have known if he'd been thinking a little clearer, been a little less distracted, his stepfather Dean might view this as a personal challenge to bring him down, to try and break him. The higher you were the further you had to fall, he'd known that once upon a time.

"Where you been boy? You been missin' for days. Whose rock you been hidin' under," Dean demands, pressing an arm up against his windpipe to pin him against the wall.

"Nowhere. I was out. 'Wasn't nowhere with anybody," Eggsy lies even as Dean applies enough pressure against his throat to make every word a battle. 

Dean isn't buying a word of it, but Eggsy refuses to grass Harry up, and his stepfather stops short of killing or even bruising Eggsy too badly-they still have another follow-up with the social worker afterall. All in all, Eggsy feels certain it could have gone a lot worse, and besides there's only a few weeks left until he's safely back in school for several hours a day, where he can maybe see Harry again.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, be mindful of the tags. I don't want to spoil any of the important plot points by being over-zealous with them, but I have attempted to list any possible triggers, and will update them if I think of any more as this story progresses.
> 
> This will be an incredibly slow burn, so those of you who are here for Hartwin, bear with me it is coming. (Any non-con or underage sex in this narrative as is warned about in the tags is not taking place between Eggsy and Harry.)
> 
> Want a peek behind the scenes of writing these stories? Got a prompt or idea for a fic you'd like to see? Drop me a note on my Tumblr: [afangirlreadsfics](http://www.afangirlreadsfics.tumblr.com)

It takes about a week, but just before Christmas Dean seems to give up trying to get a name out of Eggsy for where he was and who he might have been with the first few days after he presented. That's not to say that the two alphas don't continue to find plenty of other and new things to butt heads about, challenging one another in their struggle to establish dominance, but now that alcoholic eggnog is accounting for nearly the whole top shelf of the fridge, Dean it seems is lazy enough for the moment to let the matter slide.

Eggsy on the other hand can't seem to stop thinking about Harry, and everything the omega has done for him. The young alpha has given up wanking to fantasies about the older man; too often they left him feeling a bit hollow, and seemed to cheapen the way he felt about Harry, but his desire has hardly waned since discovering the other's status, or even now he's not seeing him five days a week. If anything, as laughably cliché as it is: absence has only made Eggsy fonder.

Harry is everything Eggsy has ever wanted, and many things he never realized he might want or need of a potential partner until the older omega offered them to him, without any ulterior motive or hidden agenda to win him over. Because Harry has been bending over backwards to help and to look out for Eggsy before he ever thought or trusted him enough to ask, before either of them knew he was an alpha. And now he's filling out applications for upper schools and scholarships, something even a few months ago Eggsy never would have imagined for himself; and through all of it Harry has never once asked him for anything, never demanded a thing of him except that he put forth an earnest and his best effort in everything he did. That kind of patience, dedication and genuine care, deserved recognition, acknowledgement, appreciation... _But how?_

He's passing a decorated shop window decked out with fairy-lights and bright holiday colors on his way home from Jamal's when it occurs to him that maybe that's the answer. He could get Harry a Christmas present, as a kind of thank you for everything that the man has been doing for him. Well, if Eggsy is honest with himself he's wanted to give Harry some kind of token or gift simply because he cares for him, but up to this point the paralyzing fear of it being rejected has proved quite effective in keeping him from following through. But he could do so now; get him a Christmas gift, and have it double as a thank you for all the omega has done for him. As long as it's not something overly sappy, Eggsy thinks, Harry wouldn't laugh at him or reject it. No, the trouble now is deciding what to get him.

It's proving harder than Eggsy had initially thought, frustratingly so. Admittedly in these last few months, particularly since the omega had seen fit to rescue him from certain disaster with his stepfather when he had presented, he's gotten to know Harry Hart a lot better. He's learned and come to appreciate his subtle humor, those rare and fleeting wry smiles he gives when he's trying not to be amused by Eggsy's cheek, his seemingly unending fountain of knowledge and experience... He's been inside and pretty thoroughly explored the man's house, but much to his dismay that doesn't mean he has any better idea what Harry might want or need; or at least that he can't or wouldn't go out and get for himself. He's at a loss. So Eggsy gives up trying to think about what Harry might want, and decides instead to think about what it is that he wants his gift to tell the other man, which as far as thought processes go, is actually a surprisingly effective tactic.

Eggsy wants Harry to know that he appreciates everything that the older man has done for- and to help him succeed, that Eggsy recognizes he didn't have to, and most of his educators haven't bothered, so he decides to play it old school and write him a letter; taking the time to make it sound polished, but sincere and to practice enough that his penmanship will be legible. Harry seems like the kind of man who would appreciate such a gesture.

Eggsy also-desperately-wants Harry to know that he cares about him, but this is a bit trickier. Harry's let him stay in his home alone because he wanted him to be safe, so he knows the older man trusts and cares about his well-being. But he had sighted the potential breech of propriety if he continued to stay once Harry returned from wherever he had been visiting, which suggested at the very least he cared to some extent what other people might think or say. Not to mention Harry has been the model of proper and politeness, it's impossible for Eggsy to glean whether or not the older omega is remotely attracted or interested in him beyond academics. If he doesn't handle this well, with infinite care, he may well fuck it all up and lose his mentor.

Everything was so much easier on the streets. He doesn't miss it exactly. It's been something of a relief that so far Dean hasn't said anything about sending him back down to Smith Street again since he's presented. But a part of him does miss the simplicity. Eggsy sauntered around the corner, leaned against the lamp post, flaunting the lines and parts of his body he knew caught most of his clientele's attention, he knew to bat his eyes and look up at them shyly through his lashes when he leaned in their car windows to tell them his going rates. Emotions didn't matter. Other people didn't matter- well except maybe the coppers, but then again-even most of them were only human. He's confident if he wanted to, if he only set his mind to it he could seduce Harry Hart too. However much he admires him, he's as much a man, human, and flawed as anyone else. But Eggsy doesn't want to. He respects Harry too much for that; doesn't want to take the easy way out this time. Eggsy knows how to seduce and manipulate a John into coming back for more, but he doesn't want to do that to Harry, because sex isn't the only, or even the most important thing he wants to have and share with Harry. He wants to hold and cuddle with him every bit as much as fuck. He wants to be with him in every sense of the word, to share in all kinds of boring domesticity, to take care of him... And there it is- that's what he'll get the older omega, he thinks with a grin.

He could ask for the money to get Harry a present, but his mum isn't likely to have any more than he does, and Dean would just laugh at him- if he decided against wailing on him for making the request in the first place. Eggsy knows how he _could_ earn it, could probably make it fast, but he doesn't want the gift he gets the omega he's grown so attached to to be in any way tainted. Eggsy's got to find a job. Trouble is he's never had one before, not an honest one anyway. So he starts small, favors for neighbors he's never looked twice at before, offering to shovel the driveways, but a couple fivers here and there are never going to add up to enough for a proper present in time for Christmas.

He hates doing it; hates that he's forced to add yet another item to the list of favors he owes Harry Hart. It makes him all the more certain that the present he gives him must be absolutely spectacular, but he simply doesn't see any other way around the problem. Eggsy needs a job to get the omega a gift, and that means he needs at least one person to vouch for him with an employer, and it certainly ain't gonna be Dean or his mum.

.......................................................................................................................

"Do I need to make an appointment for you with our psychiatrist, when you report back to headquarters," Merlin asks without preamble when the pair of them check in again.

"He needed a job."

"Ay, and a recommendation, yes I understand, what I don't understand is why you thought setting him up in the shop, on our very doorstep, was the next logical step."

"Save it," Merlin interrupted just as Harry opened his mouth to reply. "Before you pull what I'm sure is a brilliant excuse out of your ass, I don't actually care. If it'll help with that weight Lee's death put on your shoulders, I won't fight you on it. It's Arthur you're going to have to answer to. You know what he's going to say when he finds out about it, he never liked Lee, and I don't foresee him being any more welcoming of his son."

"Arthur is an ignorant and arrogant..."

"Believe me," Merlin cuts in, "I'm well aware. But Eggsy is a civilian. Placing him in the shop is a risk, unless you plan on recommending him as a candidate."

"We don't have any empty chairs."

"So you have considered it," Merlin replied in a tone that Harry could tell meant he was raising an interested eyebrow on the other end of the line. "You're right, of course, we don't have any unclaimed seats at the moment. But you are thinking about it then, recommending him as a knight? Michelle won't thank you for it."

"Because she's done such an admirable job of looking out for him since Lee's death." Merlin made a small noise which might have been ascent, but made no immediate reply to his assessment of Mrs. Unwin's care.

"He's still not the mission, Galahad. But if you must insist upon it, there are easier, even safer ways of keeping an eye on the boy...”

"It's just a job for now; let's see what he makes of it."

"You're getting soft, Harry."

"Fuck off, Rupert."

"That's better."

....................................................................................................................

Eggsy is more than a little gobsmacked when he meets Harry at the address he texted for him. Sure, he had called and asked the older man for a reference, and to see if he had any ideas where he might go about applying for a proper job, but this?

"A tailor shop, are 'ya sure about this- Mr. Hart?"

"You said you were looking for some honest work for a good wage," Harry replies with a shrug and the small beginnings of a smile curling at the corners of his mouth Eggsy has learned to watch for and come to love. "I can personally vouch for your coworkers here; and I have every faith you will rise to the occasion, if you are interested in the post. Of course, the school is looking to hire a janitor, if you would prefer." Eggsy bites his tongue to keep from saying that he's probably better equipped for the later, knowing Harry will only fight him on this point.

"But," he interjects hesitantly.

"Yes," Harry prompts patiently where they stand on the sidewalk outside the shop.

"I ain't-" Eggsy halts shaking his head and closing his mouth before starting again, doing his best impression of the older man's more polished way of speaking. "I don't have any of the sort of clothes they'd expect of someone who works here."

"Of course not," Harry replies relaxing almost as soon as he hears the primary concern the young man has to his suggestion. "You think they'd allow you to work there in a suit from any other shop?"

"I don't have the money for a proper suit, that's why I need a job."

"Is that your only objection," Harry asks gently, and Christ, Eggsy can't believe how infuriatingly patient the man can be. Not to mention obtuse...

"Why, do I need another one?" When Harry doesn't respond, continuing to await an answer from him, Eggsy nods. "Yeah, I suppose that's it. I dunno that I'll be any good, but if you think you can put in a good word and get me in, I'd be mad not to take it, right?"

The older man smiles, a full smile now, gently clapping a hand to Eggsy's shoulder, "After you then," he asks, leading the way up the steps, opening the door for him.

"I'll pay you back," Eggsy insists when the older man ushers him back towards a dressing room with one of the tailors to be fitted for a suit of his own.

"I know you will," Harry nods, knowing better than to try and argue with Eggsy about it.

Eggsy watches in fascination in the multiple mirrors as the tailor takes various measurements, before the man relieves some of his anxiety with a joke about their being a test. His job when he first starts, the man assured him, will primarily be answering the phones to book appointments, and manning the register, if he's interested in staying on they can train him to do what the tailor is doing for him now. Normally a suit would take several weeks to be made, but they will be working faster on Eggsy's so he can begin working as soon as possible.

For it being a rush job, you would never know it looking at the suit that has been made for him when he goes to pick it up at the end of the week, and get a walkthrough of his duties at the shop. He looks quite sharp, posh even, Eggsy thinks when he catches his reflection in a mirror and almost does a double take. A suit really does make a difference. Though he's still got a burning desire to see Harry in something besides his suits, something more relaxed perhaps. He's all but certain he'd be just as gorgeous.

He snaps a picture of himself in his suit during a quiet moment at the shop and sends it off to the older man before he can think better of it, with a brief thank you. He really will pay the man back for it, although he's a bit scared to find out just how much the thing costs. Not because the job doesn't pay incredibly well, but he's pretty sure he's never owned anything so expensive in his life. He'll do whatever he has, he thinks, to to make sure Dean remains in the dark about his new fancy threads and uptown job as long as possible.

**You are very welcome Eggsy. Every gentleman needs a good bespoke suit. Now you look the part of the smart, promising young man, we both know you to be. I'm pleased to hear you are enjoying the job.**

Eggsy's heart feels like it's thundering in his chest as he reads Harry's reply to his picture message. He's not altogether sure about that ' _we_ ' business, but the thought that Harry truly believes he's smart and full of promise, a gentleman even, is enough to bring a slight flush of pink to his cheeks and ears, and have him pulling out his phone and rereading the message now and again when he isn't busy.

Two weeks later, and not a moment too soon, Eggsy is picking up his first paycheck. He walks into a bank with the slip and his suit, and nobody assumes he's there to case the place. They're delighted in fact, to help set him up with an account to hold his unspent earnings, and this is loads better than under the loose floorboard in his room where his stepfather might one day stumble upon it. He hardly wants the omega to think that he throws the word around easily or judge him to be insincere, but he's almost tempted to thank Harry again. Walking back out of the bank Eggsy doesn't think he's ever felt or walked so tall.

So of course that's when Rottie and some of Dean's muppets spot him. Though in a surprising show of self-control, they don't make their presence known. It's not until later that evening, in fact, that he learns he had a tail; when his stepfather comes home and begins peppering him with blows and questions about his whereabouts and what he was doing. Eggsy wants to keep the job he's found, but is too afraid to turn up with a black-eye to come in the following morning, deciding to call in sick instead.

He feels just the slightest bit more guilty about it when Harry texts him later to say he's sorry he missed him today, and he hopes that he feels better soon. Because _of course_ the one day he doesn't go in is the day that Harry decided to drop by, Eggsy thinks flopping back on his bed miserably. He doesn't reply. He can't bring himself to outright lie to Harry; maybe if he doesn't write him back, Harry will simply assume he's resting, and he won't have to.


	5. Chapter 5

The bruises aren't entirely faded when he goes back to work the following day, but they are enough for him to feel confident he's hidden them sufficiently to avoid rousing suspicion. It's ridiculous, Eggsy supposes, he wouldn't have this job, Harry's number, or perhaps even know the older man's first name if Harry weren't aware of some kind of abuse going on at home, but Eggsy hopes rather than believes that maybe he can pass it off as a one-off. He doesn't want anyone, but especially Harry, digging too deep into his past and finding out the entirety of the abuses he's suffered, and how long his wrap sheet should actually be. He doesn't think he could bear the omega's pity, or worse his disappointment. 

New bruises come, and Eggsy finds that his stepfather cares less and less about how visible they are now, though Eggsy's become something of a pro with makeup now he knows he has someone that might take notice of them. Even so, much no doubt to Dean's disgust and bitter disappointment he hasn't yet managed to get his stepson to talk about his job, or give him access to any of the funds in his new bank account. Eggsy has now become quite good at avoiding Dean (and most of the time his gang) wherever and whenever possible. He even sets his paycheck up to deposit into his account directly to further eliminate the possibility of theft. Dean thinks he's entitled to it, especially now that Eggsy isn't as _marketable_ as a rent boy now he's presented as alpha, and is getting older than most of his perverse clientele prefer. To Eggsy's mind though, the money is no more his stepfather's than it is his. He can't give it to him, no matter how much he'd like the beatings and interrogations to stop, because it isn't his to give, it's _Harry's_. He still owes him a Christmas/thank you gift, and the money that bought his beautiful suit.

It's still intact, by some miracle; in the same immaculate shape Eggsy had maintained it before Rottie snitched about his new job and duds. Not that Dean hadn't thought about, or even wanted to damage or destroy it, but as soon as the threat had been leveled, Eggsy saw red. He became positively _feral_ , and Dean hadn't made a move for it since. Eggsy could live with the punches, if someone had to take them, he would always prefer himself to that bastard wailing on his mum. But however ridiculous the notion was, to his mind the suit was a gift from his omega, and that made it so much more than just some posh threads, _**no one**_ was about to take that from him.

He finishes the final touches on Harry's present just in time, days shy of Christmas. Eggsy makes his way to the older man's house to deliver it, only to stand nervously on the front step for the better part of 20 minutes, shivering, trying to pluck up the courage to ring the bell. After everything he's done to put this together it would be nothing short of a fuckin' waste, not to mention incredibly stupid for him not to give the omega his gifts, but now the moment has arrived his nerves are getting the better of him. _What if Harry doesn't like it? What if he only pretends to because he doesn't want to hurt Eggsy's feelings? Is he even at home?_

The door opens before Eggsy can collect himself, answering the latter question and he steps back in surprise, ducking out of the way of his clearly quite inebriated schoolmaster making his way out to the street where a cab is waiting without so much as a sideways glance at him. _Right... Week before Christmas. Normal people had parties and the like, yeah? Shoulda called first,_ he thinks feeling foolish. He's about to turn tail and head home, or at least to Ryan or Jamal's, when a bald man with glasses and a jumper who's about to close the door behind the headmaster addresses him.

"Eggsy, isn't it," the man asks with a rather thick Scottish brogue. Eggsy is confident he's never seen this man before in his life, which makes the fact he seems to know who he is just a bit unnerving, because it's framed as a question, but there's not much in the way of uncertainty in this man's voice.

"...Yea'," he confirms nodding after a moments hesitation, biting back the _'and you are'_ that's on the tip of his tongue.

"Looking for Mr. Hart, I expect. I'll go fetch him for you then," he offers, but Eggsy shakes his head.

"No," he replies, perhaps rejecting the offer a little too quickly if the other's raised eyebrows are any indication. "I mean, he's obviously busy. I should have called 'im first," Eggsy stumbles a bit embarrassed. The other man seems sober enough to be trusted to remember a set of requested directions. "If you could just tell him I stopped by," he continues looking down at the present and envelope in his hands before offering them out to the other man. "Give him these, and tell 'im Happy Christmas, yeah?"

The bald, bespectacled man nods, and Eggsy nods in confirmation. "Thanks," he manages gratefully.

"Of course, but--" Merlin begins to reply, but Eggsy is already far and away down the street out of earshot. ".. I'm sure he'd rather have it from you."

Harry stares at the present and envelope where they sit on the bar counter between his kitchen and dining room as he surveys the mess from the night before. A party with a handful of the other faculty and staff from the school, plenty of alcohol imbibed by all, and still no closer to getting to the bottom of his investigation. _And he'd missed Eggsy stopping by._ Merlin who decided to take up in the guest room in order to debrief on what he had observed the following morning, and assist Harry with the cleanup shuffles in, and seeing what has the other man's attention snorts softly.

"Well, are yeh going to open it, or just stare at the bloody thing?"

"Can't, it's not Christmas."

"Christ, you're ridiculous the pair of you. You're a grown man, Harry. You can open it whenever you want. Anyway it's from the boy, not Santa Claus," he grumbles as he begins to pick up glasses left here and there about the place.

………………………………………

"Hello Eggsy," Harry answers warmly, quite before the younger man is ready for the other to pick up his phone.

"Uh, hi," he manages shuffling to sit up from where he's lying on his bed. "I, erm, well I stopped by the other day, but you were busy with hosting somethin' and I wanted to make sure that bloke gave you your Christmas present I brought over," he manages in as near to one nervous breath as he can manage, already kicking himself for sounding so anxious.

"Yes," Harry replies.

"Oh," Eggsy manages, feeling increasingly more stupid by the minute. He'd thought maybe once Harry opened it that he would have heard something (good or bad) from the older man. He'd even written off the day immediately following the party in the off-chance he was hungover, before calling to check.

"I'm glad you called actually," Harry continues saving him from any further awkward silence or saying something even more unimpressive and unintelligent. "I was rather hoping to give you your present."

"My present," Eggsy repeats, more than a little surprised.

"Yes, I'm afraid I completely forgot to give it to you before you left after breakfast while you were staying over here."

"But that was weeks ago," Eggsy ejaculates astonished well before he can stop himself, because _Really? Harry has had a gift for him before he had even committed to getting him one?_ It's possible of course that the older man could be lying. That he's only just bought him a gift in light of Eggsy's, but somehow the younger man doesn't think so.

"I know, I've been terribly remiss, and you got me a gift anyway, even though you probably didn't expect anything from me," Harry says sounding somehow both fond and apologetic at the same time.

"So.. You liked it," Eggsy asks finally, cautiously.

"Oh, well I haven't opened it yet," the older man replies sounding a little surprised. "I'm sorry. You must have thought- It wasn't Christmas, but more importantly I suppose it didn't feel right- opening it when I hadn't given you your gift yet."

"Bit improper innit? Gettin' a gift for a student?" _Not that Eggsy actually minds of course,_ he's trying his best in fact not to let his voice give away just how thrilled he is with the prospect, although he's fairly certain he's failing, because Harry's back to his usual amusing deadpan that so many of his peers seem to miss or misinterpret.

"Mmm, well technically I've finished my semester hours as of the last week of this past term. But you may have a point there, perhaps I should return it," the older man teases.

"Oy, don't be daft! You've already told me about it you sod, you can't go return it now," Eggsy replies, though it's with a hearty chuckle.

"Keep it down," Dean shouts pounding in the shared wall and making Eggsy wince a bit, because there's no way Harry won't have heard that. "Who the hell are you talkin' to anyway Egg-head?"

"No one," Eggsy shouts back holding his mobile away so he's not shouting in Harry's ear.

"Is this a bad time," Harry asks concernedly.

"Nah, it's a great time," Eggsy assures him. "I was lookin' for an excuse to get outta the flat. D'ya wanna meet for coffee or tea, or somethin', we can exchange and open our presents," he suggests before he can overthink the idea or back out.

"Certainly," Harry agrees. "Where would you like to meet?"

……………………………………

"You didn't have to get me anything, ya know," Eggsy says as he slides into the seat across the table from where Harry has been waiting for him. He hadn't meant to run so late, except he couldn't decide what it was he should wear. 

Even now he's not entirely sure. He'd been tempted to wear his suit, after-all Harry had more or less bought it or him, and he'd still not forgotten the older man's compliments, or the rush that they'd brought, but he didn't want to be overdressed for something as casual as tea or coffee. Instead he'd gone with a more subdued track suit: simple black with some yellow striping along the sleeves and collar, with a matching polo and pants. He thought about a SnapBack, but decided against it. He felt a bit naked without it, if he was being honest with himself, but he wanted to impress. Eggsy was slowly learning what it was to be a gentleman from the other, and he felt sure a gentleman wouldn't wear such a thing for tea.

He'd feel guilty about being late- does feel guilty a tiny bit- but he's learned by now that Harry is habitually late to most everything so he's probably only just beaten him here. _Then again..._ there's no steam coming from his cup, so maybe not. Well isn't that just his luck, he thinks, fighting a frown.

"I'm sorry it took me so long I-" he begins, but Harry shakes his head, no doubt attributing his tardiness to the grumpy stepfather he heard over the phone.

"No apology necessary, Eggsy. I'm pleased you could make it," he assures him kindly. And it's only now while Harry is stooping to pluck up a small parcel from the bag he has beside him that Eggsy has an opportunity to take in and truly appreciate what the older man is wearing, and _fuckin' hell Christmas has come early, because Harry Hart actually left his house in casual threads! Well, more casual than usual at least..._ It just wasn't fair that Harry could look so much more relaxed, approachable, softer... just ditching his tie and suit in favor of a button up and cardigan; that the small smile the older man offered as he lay gift down on the table between them was nearly enough to make Eggsy forget himself and lose the power of speech.

"Really though, I mean you already got me my suit," Eggsy manages finally, fighting valiantly to pull himself together, shaking his head.

"I thought I was to understand that was a loan," Harry points out, wryly.

"Yeah, it is," the younger man jumps I quickly. "I'm gonna pay you back soon as I earn enough," Eggsy assures him firmly. "But that's still a gift innit? Ain't like I coulda ever bought that myself without you."

"You're a good investment," the older man assures him kindly, making the alpha fight back a blush. "Eggsy, you don't have to take it, if it makes you uncomfortable," Harry says finally frowning a little at the parcel he has produced, hand still covering it as though considering pulling it back across the table. Eggsy doesn't allow himself to think twice about it, he's reaching for the middle of the table, for Harry's hand and covering it with his own before the omega can take back the gift.

The touch feels _electric_ , perfect in a way that nothing in Eggsy's life ever has before. _He was made to hold this man's hand, to love, touch, provide for this absolutely gorgeous and wonderful omega._ Eggsy knows it, with a bone deep certainty now. He wonders for a moment if Harry can feel it too, before he finally comes back to Earth, forcing himself to speak.

"No, it don't make me uncomfortable. I want it. I'm sure it's aces, I just... Wasn't expecting anything that's all," the young alpha finally manages to reassure him, and damn if it doesn't take just about everything in him to let go and take his hand back, but someone is approaching with their tea and Eggsy is suddenly reminded of their public venue. He's well shot of the age of consent, and as the older man pointed out-not technically Harry's pupil anymore, but that doesn't mean they wouldn't get strange looks. He doesn't want Harry to get into any sort of trouble, no matter how much he mourns the loss of contact.

"Open yours firs' though," Eggsy requests a bit shyly, forcing himself not to shy away from Harry's gaze. 

It's not so much that the young man doesn't enjoy presents, ( _because he's dying to know what the older man got for him, and even if it's rubbish he will cherish it all the same_ ) as it is that he's not accustomed to getting them. After the death of his father, Eggsy had grown up a lot faster in many respects than most of his peers. He'd certainly learned better than to ask his mother for things quickly enough. But it went even deeper than knowing she didn't have the money to spare, Eggsy had more or less trained himself not to wish for or want things to avoid the inevitable disappointment. Maybe that was why, whatever this thing was that he felt for Harry was so terrifying. He'd never wanted anything like this, or this badly for as long as he could remember.

"Alright," Harry nods, smiling softly, pulling out the carefully wrapped gift, and the envelope fixed to it from his bag.

"Oh, you don't gotta read that right now," Eggsy begins as Harry pulls off the envelope and begins to open it, a bit embarrassed. He'd agonized for countless drafts and wadded up bits of paper over what and how exactly to say what it was he wanted to convey his gratitude towards him, but he'd never actually imagined Harry would read it in his company.

"Nonsense," Harry shakes his head dismissively. "-Unless you really don't want me to," he offers pausing where he had begun to pull out the letter. Eggsy hesitates, biting his bottom lip a little considering.

"It's nothin' bad," he assures the omega finally shaking his head. "I just didn't think I'd be around when you got to read it. It's just a thank you for everythin' you helped me with and been doin' for me," he explains. "You can save it for later, yea' and open your present now?" Harry nods with a small understanding smile, putting aside the letter in favor of the package it had been nestled with instead.

Harry unwraps the present, taking the time to peel up each piece of tape and unfold the paper, _because of course he bloody does._ Eggsy wants to tell him the paper ain't that nice, not like it's worth saving, but something has him biting his tongue. It's probably what Harry does with all the wrapped gifts he receives, but the reverence with which he handles the wrappings, slowly revealing the gift as if it's already-without any idea what it is- something incredibly precious to the older omega takes Eggsy's breath away. He hopes, chooses to believe, that maybe even if this is simply Harry's way, that his gift might be that precious to him, that he will like it as much as he's hoped while making it for him.

Harry smiles as his fingers meet the warm, infinitely soft material of cashmere and merino hidden beneath the paper, gently lifting it from the wrappings, and doing a double-take when he notices that the gift is handmade. Eggsy might have bought him a scarf from just about anywhere. He might even have bought a homemade one like this off of someone, a neighbor perhaps, but somehow instinctively, Harry knows that isn't the case. The fibers smell of the young alpha. Not overwhelmingly so, but more than could have happened just handling the scarf to wrap it up. _Eggsy made this, Harry marvels. **For him.**_ And it is at once the most personal and touching gift he has ever been given.

Eggsy's worrying his bottom lip again making it start to swell where it's been worked over by his teeth as he watches, forgetting at times to breathe while he waits for Harry's reaction.

"Eggsy," Harry manages finally voice full of a kind of wonder and awe that sends a positive jolt of electricity to Eggsy's heart, and embarrassingly but blessedly concealed by their table, somewhere a bit further south. "This is..." Harry continues shaking his head still admiring the scarf between his hands. "Incredible, thank you," he concludes finally with a bright and full-bodied smile Eggsy has never seen before, but he suspects he's already addicted to. And then Harry is wrapping the scarf around his neck, because he likes it so much he's not going to wait until he's back out in cold enough elements to necessitate wearing it, and Eggsy thinks he couldn't have dreamed a better reaction to his present than this.

Harry likes it. He genuinely likes it. And _Harry is wearing his scent,_ the young alpha thinks, near giddy at the thought. Not that this had been his sole reason for deciding to knit the other man a scarf, mind you. It hadn't even occurred to Eggsy at first. He'd merely thought it might be a smart gift to accompany the wool coat he often wears, and something which might suggest (subtly of course) a desire to care for the omega. It hadn't been until he'd been working awhile on that first skein that he'd realized it would carry a faint trace of him for at least a little while after giving the thing to it's new owner. It was nowhere near strong enough to truly mark the omega with the scent of a specific alpha, to warn off other interested parties, but Harry, suppressants and Alpha-front, or no would still have been able to detect it. And he'd had no compunction about putting it on immediately. Eggsy does his best not to preen, but couldn't have helped the bright grin that came over him if he'd tried.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, be mindful of the tags. I don't want to spoil any of the important plot points by being over-zealous with them, but I have attempted to list possible triggers, and will update them if I think of any more as this story progresses.
> 
> This will be an incredibly slow burn, so those of you who are here for Hartwin, bear with me it is coming. (Any non-con or underage sex in this narrative as is warned about in the tags is not taking place between Eggsy and Harry.)
> 
> Want a peek behind the scenes of writing these stories? Got a prompt or idea for a fic you'd like to see? Drop me a note on my Tumblr: [afangirlreadsfics](http://www.afangirlreadsfics.tumblr.com)

"The boy fancies you, Harry," Merlin points out later that evening when the the older man has returned from tea with Eggsy, the agents checking in with one another to exchange intel they've gathered about their persons of interest.

"Why do all our conversations lately seem to be more about Lee's son than my intel and this mission?"

"You tell me, Galahad," the other man replies dryly, sounding unamused.

"Anyway you've met Eggsy once and you've said perhaps two sentences to him, how could you possibly know that," the older man asks, noticing as the words fall out, which no doubt Merlin will notice too, that he sounds more than a tiny bit defensive about it. _Dammit._

"I might not get out in the field like you, but I do happen to work for a secret spy organization, and Kingsmen doesn't make a habit of hiring idiots. You'd see it too if you weren't so... Involved."

"It's not like that."

"If you say so."

"Eggsy just needs stability, someone he can count on, a good male role model..."

"And you think that should be you?"

"I owe him."

"No, you feel as though you owe his father."

Harry almost replies that he _does_ owe Lee Unwin, there's no _feel_ about it, but he knows it will only brook further argument between them. "It's the same thing," he replies instead. Because really now Lee is dead, it only makes sense the debt that he owes be transferred to his son.

"It's really not."

"I don't know," Harry sighs heavily in defeat. "I don't know," he admits. "I don't suppose I am the best role model-" Merlin snorts softly in agreement, _the bastard_. "But he needs someone." _And nobody else seems to be stepping up to the plate,_ Harry thinks.

"You can't give him what he needs," Merlin replies, voice firm, but Harry knows well enough by now that his old friend is speaking out of concern. "You can't be his stability, Harry. You can't even promise to be around consistently, or you would have been doing so since Lee died. You have to let him go, before it's too late for the both of you."

He's right of course. Harry knows it even as his fingers play with the beautiful scarf Eggsy made and gave him hours ago that he still has not managed to take off yet, but he can't bring himself to face what his old friend is saying-not now, so he hangs up on Merlin instead. He's sure to get an earful for that later.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

_How could things go so bad so quickly?_

If Eggsy had had any idea that his first kiss would end like this (well the first kiss he'd initiated and actually wanted that is): abruptly, with his partner stumbling backwards and stammering through apologies... Well, no, even if he hadn't tried to kiss the other man, Eggsy was every bit as certain as he had been five minutes ago that he would always have wondered and regretted not taking the chance. He's not sure which is worse now though: the pining and wondering for the rest of his life, or having the kiss and the rejection some part of him had always known would inevitably follow it. Because Harry- _**Mr. Hart**_ \- he corrects mentally kicking himself, looks horrified and Eggsy thinks he might just be sick from it if he doesn't look away soon, if the older man doesn't shut up and quit fuckin' apologizing...

"Oh God Eggsy, I didn't think- I should have known... This is my fault, I'm so sorry," he's saying even as he continues to put more space between them.

"No," Eggsy replies shaking his head. "No, stop it. Just stop it! Quit talkin'," he demands, all but shouting the last words as the dam of emotions threatens to spill over, before getting a hold of himself. "I'm the one that 'shoulda known, there weren't never any chance a proper bloke like you was gonna go for a pleb like me."

Mr. Hart opens his mouth like he wants to say something to the contrary, but words seem to be failing him, and Eggsy knows and shakes his head again.

"Don't. Please," he adds, the request almost a plea at this point, sea green eyes watering. "Don't tell me that ain't true. Don't try to tell me I'm special or somethin'. Anythin' you say now ain't gonna make this better, just harder an' hurt worse, so just-don't. Please H- please, don't," he pleas cutting himself short of using the other's first name as he has been 'Harry' for so long in his head.

The older man frowns softly, and the withering, pitying look that he's giving Eggsy threatens to break him. He hesitates for a moment and then, "Eggsy, I know it might seem... Romantic somehow, but there are things you might want with a mate someday... things an omega like me cannot give you. You don't want to tie yourself down now and live to regret it later. As much as you think you feel for me now, you'd come to resent and hate me in the end for everything I would hold you back from," Harry replies sadly shaking his head.

"I said shut it," Eggsy snaps shaking his head trying to keep a hold on the fleeting twinge of anger the other' words incite rather than the ache in his chest that's only going to get worse. "You don't get to tell me what I want Harry Hart," he continues shaking his head, the first and only time he's ever used his alpha authoritative voice with him, or any other omega. But only to get him to be quiet, to command his attention, to get the infuriating man to listen to him, nothing more. "You ain't never done that before, and I ain't about to let you start that fuckin' shite now."

"Just because I'm young, don't mean I don't know what I want. Just 'cause maybe I don't look like a proper alpha- 'cause I ain't so big as some of 'em... maybe I ain't even gonna be as big as you, but- that don't mean I can't take care 'a you. I'd do whatever it takes to treat you proper, be glad and proud to if you was mine. You're older, not ancient. 'Sides there's plenty of other ways 'a raising a family if I was to change my mind about it later, ain't there? That's what you was getting at, wasn't it- Pups," Eggsy asked appraising the other carefully even as Harry continued to regard him nervously.

"I want you, to be your alpha, the rest of it-if that comes together for us-that's just bonus, innit? Forget about all the reasons why we shouldn't for a minute. Tell me you don't want this, that I imagined and made a bigger deal outta you and me these last few months than was actually there, and I'll not bring it up or be botherin' you about it again," the young man promises. "Because I'm 'earing a whole lotta excuses, but you never actually said you didn't want this, just that _I_ shouldn't want an old omega like you."

"Eggsy," Harry begins.

"Nah," Eggsy stops him holding up a finger, stopping just short of his lips because _oh god does he want to, but he **can't** keep doing this to himself. Not if Harry really doesn't want him._ "No 'Eggsy', no 'buts'. It's simple Harry, do you want this, yes or no?"

"This anything _but_ simple," Harry replies frustratedly as if Eggsy is missing the obvious.

"It can be. Right here, right now, with me. To hell with everythin' else, we can figure out the rest of it and how everybody will take it later," Eggsy replies equally frustrated with the other for being so thick.

"Eggsy you're confused. You may think you have some sort of feelings for me, but..."

"This has got nothin' to do with me da' being gone if that's what you was about to say, so don't patronize me. I know you ain't him, and I don't want 'ya to be. I don't want no younger omega. I want you. Just the way 'ya are. So the question is: Do-you-want-me," Eggsy asks enunciating and emphasizing each word.

"No," Harry replies, shaking his head. "I don't." Eggsy heart drops ever so slightly even as he steels himself against the disappointment and rejection his life has taught him to inevitably expect by now.

"Now make me believe 'ya," Eggsy replies unconvinced, and Harry knows that he's well and truly sunk, because how is he supposed to do that? 

In another time, if Eggsy were older, if he weren't the son of the man he owes so much- his very life to... Harry could easily fall for this boy. Perhaps, though he's loathe to admit it and hates himself a little for it-he already has, but the fact remains that he was just that: a boy. So young, he had everything ahead of him, and whatever feelings the older man may have for him Harry's managed to stubbornly ignore and refuse to explore, Harry knows that he cares too much for Eggsy to burden him. So Harry does the only thing he can think of to push Eggsy away: he lies; and just in case he can't pull off convincing the young alpha, he forces himself to be cruel in his rejection.

"How is it you think you could be my alpha, you can't take care of me, Eggsy. You can't even take care of yourself." Eggsy opens his mouth, first in astonishment because he'd expect this kind of shit from his asshole of a stepfather, but Harry has _never_ spoken to him like this, and keeps it open on the verge of protesting, before Harry continues, silencing him. "You can't protect me from anyone, you can't even protect me from your stepfather."

"Wha' the fuck are 'ya bangin' on about? What does 'e got to do with us, Harry? 'Arry," Eggsy calls after the older man as he begins walking away, his shouts becoming increasingly more desperate with each call of the omega's name. But Harry doesn't stop, doesn't even look back, as he leaves Eggsy standing there staring after him, his heart in pieces.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

It doesn't take more than a few moments after he's returned home to their flat to find out just what it was that Harry was referring to with his stepfather, because Dean wastes no time at all shoving him bodily against the wall, vein in his neck throbbing, eyes wild, and spittle flying as he lashes into him. 

"I told yer mum. I did. I warned her there was somethin' not quite right about ya. First you don't present at the proper age, an' now you hav' you're... A fucking freak," Dean shouts, and it's only years of becoming accustomed, desensitized to this sort of volume and talk that keep Eggsy from flinching under the other man.

"Ain't no alpha," he mutters under his breath shaking his head. "No alpha," he continues, increasing once more in volume with each word, "With any kinda self respect would throw themselves at a fuckin' useless omega like that geezer tha' was helpin' in your history class."

"What the hell are ya talkin' about," Eggsy asks indignantly even as he feels his heart and nerves beginning to sink.

"Don't ya play smart with me," Dean snaps. "Don't matter now anyways, does it? I talked to the school. He ain't gonna be showing his face around there no more. He'll be lucky if he ever finds a teachin' post."

"What did you do?"

"Reported 'im," Dean grins maliciously. "Like any good an' attentive parent woulda done with a teacher spending a little too much 'quality time' with his students."

"You ain't nev'r even come close to bein' a _good_ parent. 'Sides Mr. Hart didn't do anything," Eggsy protests, feeling a surge of anger rising up within him. Harry hasn't done anything he deserves to be punished like this for. If there were such a thing as karma it should be his stepfather's world that's crashing down around him, not Harry's.

"I found all those tests and applications to 'em posh schools," Dean continues, ignoring him. "Thought he was you're ticket outta 'ere did ya? What'd he ask for for all that help 'eh? Your hands on his stiffie? Yer mouth? You're tight little arse? Did you give it to him, you little slut? Who did you think was gonna pay for it all? No teacher's gonna have that kinda money, not even one that dresses like 'im. You're mum ain't got a dime, and I sure ain't about to foot the bill. Yer already draggin' us down as it is now you presented alpha, and whatd'ya think you're doing disappearing all the time these days? Too good to run packages now? I think you're getting too big for them britches egg-head."

"If you found the applications then you'd know I was applying for scholarships," Eggsy protests. He knows better by now, after all these years, than to try and argue with Dean when he's like this, but some part of him can't help it. _This man is threatening his future, has hurt his- has hurt Harry._ He can't be level-headed and bite his tongue now. "Unless you can't read 'em. What's 'a matter? Don't want me 'ta go 'ta upper schools and get smarter than you?"

"Seems to me you think 'ya already are."

"Yea', I migh' be," Eggsy replies defiantly although he's all but certain of the fact he is, despite being foolish enough to be picking a fight with his irate stepfather.

"Yea' well that smart little mouth of yours can be put to much better use than talkin' smack to me."

"Wha-" Eggsy starts, but Dean doesn't give him the chance to say anything else, before he's grabbing him painfully by the hair, shoving him down to his knees on the hard tile floor, while his other hand is working on the fly of his pants.

"Ya know what 'ta do, you little slag. And ya know what _I'll do_ if you try any funny business, so you do a proper job, yeah? You tend to it like it belongs to that posh omega fucker you been so buddy-buddy with lately." 

Dean tugs harder on his hair, tugging at his scalp as he guides his stepson to do the unthinkable. Eggsy's eyes water. Dean hasn't forced himself on him in years-hasn't expressed any interest since he started turning him out, and it's not really a kindness, but Eggsy has almost come to see it as one. It's been so long since anything like this has happened, some traitorous part of him started to think it wasn't a possible outcome for insubordination with Dean anymore. He doesn't cry, but only because Eggsy doesn't want to give Dean _that_ satisfaction too. His stepfather goes out, leaving him in a crumpled and pathetic pile on the floor when he's through. Eggsy can still taste him in his mouth, barely making it to the loo before he vomits, crawling into the shower and attempting-praying even-to melt away under the scalding stream of water as it begins to turn his skin red.

Eggsy's stupid. He's stupid for ever believing that maybe becoming an alpha would mean anything different for him, or the way Dean sees or treats him. He's stupid for thinking anyone could ever love someone so damaged, so used and abused as he has been, but especially someone like Harry Hart. Most of all he's stupid for thinking, even for a minute, that he could change anything, or be anything- that he could be happy. He's learned well before now happiness for him would always be fleeting, never something he was allowed to hold on to or keep, but somewhere along the way he'd forgot. _**Stupid.**_

_He's got to get out of here._

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

"You did the right thing," Merlin offers up as Harry contemplates pouring himself a shot of brandy.

"Yes, well then why do I feel like pond scum?"

"I said the right thing, Harry, not the easy thing," the tech wizard points out with an impatient sigh. "It's a schoolboy crush, nothing more. He will recover from the disappointment in time, move on to the next person that catches his fancy, and you'll be a fond memory."

"Not that fond," Harry mumbles.

"You did what you had to do to push him away, Eggsy will understand that someday. Besides now that his stepfather has seen to it you won't be going back to the school, we need a new angle for reconnaissance. You're damn good at undercover work and loosening tongues, but this has been a tougher egg to crack than we had initially thought. You won't have the time or be in a place where you can be there for Eggsy the way you have been," Merlin points out.

"That's what I'm afraid of."

"He's nearly 18 now Harry, and he's finally presented, he's a young man in the eyes of the law and most anyone who counts, he's got to make his own choices, and accept the consequences for them, good and bad. I know you have to play this alpha-role for the organization and world at large, but you must see that you cannot protect him, and it was never your job to."

"The consequences of what choices Rupert, what is it you know? What are you not telling me," Harry asks, immediately sitting up and taking notice of the other's words.

"His cell phone pinged about twenty-minutes ago on the corner of Smith street, and hasn't moved from that cell tower's radius since. It could be a coincidence, but you and I don't much believe in those. CCTV makes it look like he's seeking out solicitors."

"Fuck. Twenty minutes ago, and you're telling me this **_now_**?"

"Harry-"

"No, don't 'Harry' me right now."

"Harry," Merlin tries again, ignoring the other's attempt to stop him as he makes to dash out the door. "You cannot rescue him from everything. Every bad thing he does, or that happens to him, it isn't all-"

"This is absolutely my fault," Harry cuts him off before his friend can say anymore, hanging up to go and find Eggsy.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, be mindful of the tags. I don't want to spoil any of the important plot points by being over-zealous with them, but I have attempted to list any possible triggers, and will update them if I think of any more as this story progresses.
> 
> This will be an incredibly slow burn, so those of you who are here for Hartwin, bear with me it is coming. (Any non-con or underage sex in this narrative as is warned about in the tags is not taking place between Eggsy and Harry.)
> 
> Want a peek behind the scenes of writing these stories? Got a prompt or idea for a fic you'd like to see? Drop me a note on my Tumblr: [afangirlreadsfics](http://www.afangirlreadsfics.tumblr.com)

_Harry's here. Because of course he fuckin' is, Eggsy's life couldn't really get a whole hell of a lot worse at this point,_ the young alpha thinks, stuffing fists in his jacket pockets, _having the omega he loves find him like this is just the cherry on the cake, innit?_ Eggsy wants to cry, wants to throw himself into the car at the curb, into Harry's arms and sob. But whatever Harry came here for it can't be to comfort him, Harry doesn't want Eggsy, he made that perfectly clear already.

"What are 'ya doin' here then, Guv," Eggsy asks in a huff as the older man's car pulls up to a stop in front of him, Harry leaning a little further out the window in an attempt to capture Eggsy's attention ( _as if he didn't have it the minute the young man spotted him_ ) and speak to him. "Ya gonna report me, have me arrested?"

"No, Eggsy, of course not," Harry replies sounding a little surprised at the suggestion. _Huh, maybe he hadn't._

"Yea', course not," Eggsy repeats bitterly, because afterall how did Harry know to come here? Maybe he wasn't here for Eggsy at all, just illicit companionship. "You wanna fuck me then?"

"Christ Eggsy," Harry gasps at his directness, Eggsy shrugs.

"Or I dunno maybe you'd rather have it the other way..." Eggsy doesn't know, wants even as he knows It couldn't be further from true to convince himself he doesn't care now the omega has rejected him. It occurs to him now though that Harry never actually did give him an answer about why it is he pretends that he's an alpha. Perhaps he's got some kind of weird kink or sexual hang-up... _Wouldn't be the first like that Eggsy's encountered..._

"No Eggsy, that's not why I'm here, I-"

"No? Well, bugger off then, you'll scare away people that are," the young man replies coldly.

"Eggsy what are you doing here? You don't have to do this. You have a job-"

"I don't want it," Eggsy snaps stubbornly shaking his head, because how could he possibly go back and show his face in there now? "I don't need no more pity or handouts from you any more, or anybody else, so just get outta here, yea'? And quit lookin' at me like that."

"Like what," Harry asks, and it's only because Eggsy knows better, knows too well that this omega doesn't want him that he can ignore the way it sounds as though the older man's heart is breaking on his behalf.

"Like you're all broken up about this, like it's a waste of my potential. I'm good at this. You was the only one deluded enough to think I could be with anythin' else, but _this_? I'm good at this. People 'round here ain't too good to be with a chav like me, so best 'ya just ship off, so I can sees about some 'a them other blokes," Eggsy replies bitterly, shoving himself away from Harry's car.

"Was never really about seein' something special in me anyway, was it 'Arry? You never saw anythin' in me but my dead da's face," he spits, because it hadn't been enough it seems for Dean to simply humiliate him, use and leave him spent on the floor. No his stepfather had to be absolutely certain he'd crushed any sense of hope, and stirrings of rebelling against him from the young alpha.

_ "Did your precious omega tell 'ya he was in the army, when you was suckin' up to 'im and suckin' him off? Served with your ol' man, he did. He's the reason he's dead," Dean grins delightedly as he's cleaning himself up, throwing an old folded photo of a young Lee, with a squad of men and a distinctly younger Harry Hart to the floor beside Eggsy. _

"H-how much," Harry chokes out, still looking at him with something far too much like pity for Eggsy's liking.

"What for," the alpha asks angrily.

"For you for the night- _for good_ \- so you don't have to do this," Harry replies reaching for his hip pocket. "Whatever it is, Eggsy I'll pay it."

"I don't want your fuckin' money Harry! Weren't 'ya listenin'? I'll mail you a check for the suit, yea', but you don't want me, you was pretty damn clear about tha', so stop trying to buy me."

"Eggsy, these men-"

"Don't want me neither, not for longer than it takes 'me to get off, at least. Yea, I got it, Guv. You really think I don't know that already? Least they're up front 'bout it. It's like you said, 'bout time for me to start takin' care 'a myself," Eggsy replies scathingly.

"Eggsy, please-that's not what..."

"Fuck off, old man. Just fuck off," Eggsy shouts, tearing off down a nearby alleyway where Harry's car won't be able to follow, before the omega can see the tears streaming down his face.

Harry doesn't bother with a greeting, or even pleasantries, nor does he wait for Merlin's when he calls. "Where's his phone now?"

"We haven't bugged Eggsy's phone, so it's just like tracking any other civilian- it's based off of whatever tower he's closest to. I'll only be able to give you a several block radius," Merlin replies, as the sound of furious typing fills the background.

"What have you got," Harry asks impatiently.

"Headed southeast, back towards council flats. He could be headed home."

"Not likely, keep tracking him," Harry replies shaking his head, deciding to find a safer place to park his car and look for Eggsy on foot so he can't dodge him in another alley again. Merlin doesn't try to tell him this is an abuse of Kingsmen resources, that this isn't the mission, or Harry's responsibility. The tech wizard is strangely silent for some time in fact while Harry races to catch up to Eggsy, save for the occasional clacking of keys and small intakes of breath. 

"Fuck Harry, I'm sorry," he apologizes finally, still typing, tracking and retrieving data. "I didn't realize the extent of it all with yer boy. I wouldn'ta been so hard on you if I had. They've made a fair attempt 'a hiding it, but he's been in hospital more times than any young man his age should."

"Three broken ribs at eight, Jesus.." Merlin mutters under his breath, clearly appalled.

"You didn't know," Harry demands voice a low growl just thinking of the kind of hurt Eggsy has had to endure over the years, somewhat grateful Merlin isn't giving him too many details just yet. Although he wants to read absolutely everything later. _And then he'd gone and compounded it, utterly crushed Eggsy and his dreams. Would he be out on the streets like this tonight if he hadn't been so awful in rejecting him that afternoon? How many times has he been out here like this before?_

"Swear it. It's like I've been saying, Eggsy wasn't Kingsmen business or part of your mission. If Arthur saw me digging he'd have had both our necks. I didn't dig any deeper than his juvenile records." Arthur might still have their necks, Harry knows, but he's past caring about that now. "You forget you've got a secret to protect. If Arthur finds out what yeh are..."

"I don't care," Harry snaps racing down yet another side street. _He knows. Perhaps he did forget for awhile in his desire to be there for his young pupil, but he could hardly entirely forget what he is, no matter how hard he's tried to sometimes._ Getting too close to Eggsy has always meant risking exposing himself. Kingsmen has been his life and lifeblood for decades, Merlin his friend for just as long, but he would-will- find a new way of life, a new livelihood if necessary if it means that he can look out for Eggsy the way he always should have been to honor Lee's sacrifice.

"Ay, I see that now," Merlin concedes with a heavy sigh. "I'll miss yeh blowing off all my mission suggestions, you know."

"I know," Harry replies a little softer now. "I'll miss you in my ear. But he needs me."

"Yes, it seems he does."

Eggsy seems to be of a differing opinion since Harry rejected him earlier that evening however, because the most Harry and Merlin manage to track down is the young alpha's phone where he's chucked it in a large rubbish bin some blocks away and Harry has to fight hard from becoming too discouraged.

_"Oh Eggsy, where are you?"_

………………………………………

" 'ow much for that mouth 'a yours, sweetheart?" The man's drunk, as it is he's barely standing still without teetering a little, but Eggsy's not bothered. Some of the best customers he's ever had have been in similar states, besides depending on the kind of drunk-some of 'em tip better than the sober ones.

"75," Eggsy replies, turning on a saucy sort of smirk towards the solicitor. On Smith street he'd probably be forced to charge less with their being more competition, but since Harry scared him off of his usual spot... _No, he doesn't want to think about him right now. He wants to lose himself. And this, and the bottle of vodka he's quickly gone through should do the trick well enough._

"You that good then," the man asks considering him.

"I am," Eggsy nods. "Price can be 50 if it takes me longer than 10 to getcha off," he negotiates, sending a moment's hesitation and indecision from his potential customer. _He has him now._

Eggsy is gagging, but not because his customer is particularly large ( _he's rather disappointingly small in fact_ ), or because he thinks it will bring the other man off faster, but because almost as soon as he's wrapped his mouth around him he can't force the image, the taste of Dean and what he'd suffered a few hours ago at his stepfather's hands out of his mind. He nearly bites the man's bits, as he's fighting to push the thoughts back down, fists clenching and breath speeding up and becoming increasingly more shallow... 

Eggsy doesn't know if he managed to get the other man off within his promised deadline or not, because the next thing he knows his John is lying against the wall bloodied and bruised groaning, and the sound of sirens is becoming steadily louder. _Fuck._

The young alpha wants to run, tries to, but he's still disoriented and confused from his earlier blackout and time-loss. He can't really remember where he is or how he got here. His head is spinning, and Eggsy can't be entirely sure how much of that is the alcohol's doing, but he feels like he's going to be sick. Even moreso when the coppers slap the cold hard steel around his wrists and load him into the car.

………………………………………

"Harry, you're not going to like this," his old friend cautions him. Harry for his part nearly says that he doesn't like any of this whole debacle. Everything seems to be spinning rapidly out of his control, although if he's honest with himself it was probably just an illusion of control on his part anyway.

"What is it?"

"You're boy just got picked up. He's sitting in a holding cell downtown."

"Fuck," Harry curses.

………………………………………

"I keep tellin' 'ya there's been some kinda mistake, I ain't got no lawyer to be visitin' me. I need one 'a them appointed types, from you lot, yea," Eggsy sighs exasperated, when they inform him his lawyer will be with the presently.

"Oh no," the alpha starts when he spots Harry Hart at the end of the hall making his way down towards where he's being held. "No, no. This ain't my lawyer. I don't wanna see 'im. I don't wanna talk to 'im... Take me back to my cell and throw away the key," Eggsy protests. "An' you, I thought tol' you to fuck off," he continues rounding on Harry.

"Eggsy," Harry starts. "Eggsy, please don't do this," he pleas even as the guard escorting the older man pauses with him in the middle of the hallway. "I can help you. Please, let me help you."

"I don't want this man's help with my case. I don't care if that means I gotta wait until morning for somebody else, I wanna go back to my cell," Eggsy replies to the unspoken question being asked by the officer monitoring him. The woman nods decisively, helping Eggsy up to his feet and cuffing him again, before leading him away from a frankly devastated looking Harry. _Good,_ Eggsy thinks fleetingly, _so much the better._

He's being charged with prostitution. The man with whom he's been 'engaged' as his lawyer likes to call it ( _bit ridiculous, Eggsy thinks._ ) is in the hospital being checked over, but doesn't appear to be too grievously injured besides some bruising to his ribs and a few scrapes here and there. It appears at some point Eggsy went off on him, although the John is embarrassed enough by the solicitation charges being brought against him not to press any charges against Eggsy for whatever happened. 

That Eggsy cannot remember what set him off or wailing on the other man, are not-his lawyer tells him-likely to make his own sentencing any gentler, as it he is ordinarily of sound and whole mind, and was presumably so when he decided to sell himself and sexual favors for money last night. He is young however, which could work in his favor with the right judge.

Fortunately enough they get that the right sort of judge, and Eggsy's bound and determined not to waste his second chance when he's walking out of the courthouse the following day on probation. He can't go back home. In the first place, it's been a long time since the place has been home for him, but more importantly he knows parole won't mean anything to his stepfather. Dean will have him back on the streets selling himself, or peddling drugs again as soon as he can, and if he is stupid enough to get caught it's Eggsy's own damn fault. A few weeks ago he'd have called Harry, but he can't now, won't allow himself to start that, or even to start thinking of the omega now-not for any great length of time at least, it hurts too much.

Eggsy goes to the shop first, and apologizes for not giving them another two weeks with his notice. Then to the bank with his final paycheck and gets a cheque for the cost of his suit which he posts to the older omega who bought it for him. He continues to send the cheque each week with progressively more frustrated and rude comments to the recipient in the notes section ( _"cash this you bloody wanker"_ ), until it finally posts, presumably once Harry has determined that Eggsy isn't going to give up on his promise to pay him back. He doesn't bother with getting a new mobile or number. If there's one thing Harry's proven it's that he's a stubborn and industrious bastard, he'd probably track it down and try to use it eventually anyway. At any rate, Eggsy doesn't have anything to say, and can't bring himself to hear anything that the older omega might either. He bounces from Jamal's to Ryan's, and friends and family of his friends to avoid his stepdad long enough to finish all his exams before he makes his way down to the nearest recruitment office.

It isn't what Harry had in mind for him when they'd talked about career paths, but Eggsy needs to get away, _anywhere else but here_ , and the marines were good enough for his da', weren't they? Eggsy does his best not to dwell on the fact they're also the reason he grew up without Lee Unwin. If something should happen to him, at least he won't be leaving a family or child behind; if anything should go wrong somewhere there at least won't be many to miss him.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, be mindful of the tags. I don't want to spoil any of the important plot points by being over-zealous with them, but I have attempted to list any possible triggers, and will update them if I think of any more as this story progresses.
> 
> This will be an incredibly slow burn, so those of you who are here for Hartwin, bear with me it is coming. (Any non-con or underage sex in this narrative as is warned about in the tags is not taking place between Eggsy and Harry.)
> 
> Want a peek behind the scenes of writing these stories? Got a prompt or idea for a fic you'd like to see? Drop me a note on my Tumblr: [afangirlreadsfics](http://www.afangirlreadsfics.tumblr.com)

It's two months too late, but Harry finally wraps up his mission. Kingsmen uncovers and puts away the head of a local gang and smuggling ring. Finally Harry Hart has all the time in the world to spend doting on and protecting the young man he has come to care so much for, but Eggsy won't have him. Though after the brutal way in which he tried to push him away- _rejected him_ his mind corrects- Harry can't say as he blames the alpha for making himself scarce. Eggsy, is in fact, nowhere to be found at any of his old haunts though.

It's Merlin who eventually locates him and informs the older man that he's enlisted with the marines. And it's probably not just to get as far away from the omega who broke his heart as possible ( _at least Harry certainly hopes that it isn't- that the young alpha didn't make such a big life decision so rashly_ ), but it certainly feels that way if he allows himself enough self-pity.

Harry's a hollowed version of himself. There's still Kingsmen of course, still days where everything turns out okay: he gets to save the world, add another ridiculous tabloid headline to the wall in his office. And it's not as if he's completely alone. Being a spy might tend to make one a loaner, but he's got Rupert. Honestly, he probably couldn't get rid of his best friend if he tried or genuinely wanted to, but he's nearly been his shadow these last few months since the young alpha slipped through his fingers. The tech and handler won't say that he's worried about his friend, but Harry's a spy, and as Merlin has pointed out Kingsmen doesn't make a habit of going idiots, no matter how much Harry feels like one where Eggsy is concerned.

Harry hasn't had a heat in over a year, and no reason to expect that to change. He can get away with hiding his status with half his regular dose of suppressants now he's not going through regular cycles. He's getting older now, having any pups at his age would be a miracle, so it only makes sense his body slowing down. Which is no doubt why when the first tell-take signs of a heat begin to crop up he's able to write them off. He is decidedly less successful in doing so while making his exit from his latest mission with his stolen intel when he realizes the sudden rush he's feeling is more than just adrenaline pumping through him.

_Fuck._

The debrief with Arthur, which he couldn't possibly justify delaying 3-4 days in order to be well shot of his unexpected surge of hormones, with the mission being on home soil, is the most excruciating Harry has ever endured. The head of the organization is insufferable enough most of the time, but Harry's skin feels like an ill-fitted suit: pulled entirely too tight. It's taking a not inconsiderable effort to resist the urge to squirm in his chair each time he feels that familiar cramping in his abdomen. Sweat and slick will follow soon, and it's all Harry can do to move the meeting along as quick as he can to get the hell out of there before he's exposed. Fortunately Arthur doesn't seem to enjoy his company any more than Harry does his, but it's a close enough call. 

It's not as if Harry's a novice to all of this, even if it has been over a year since the last cycle. He knows how to make his body feel good during a heat, what he needs to do to take care of himself, but this isn't like any of his previous heats. His body isn't simply indiscriminately craving the sensation of being filled and knotted anymore. His usual plastic and rubber stand-ins are even less successful than usual, and he refuses to seek out a one-time partner for the next few days. No, Harry's very body is betraying him now, lusting after the one person he can't have. The one person he shouldn't even want.

Because for all that Eggsy is an alpha, and apparently a damn compatible one to his omega, Eggsy wasn't entirely inaccurate in his assessment that Harry sees Lee's face when he looks at him. How can he not, when he owes the man his very life? Eggsy is his own man of course, both so like and very distinctly different from the father he's never really known. But he is so young. Even now that Eggsy is of age, knowing that he's met this boy when he was still a chubby-cheeked preteen, well it's hard for Harry not to feel... Well, predatory for noticing how well he's grown into his body and looks. He knows of course that it's not as though he's simply been waiting for Eggsy to be able to give proper consent to pursue him, but doesn't mean others wouldn't wonder about them. 

So Harry spends the first 24 hours of his unexpected heat taking particular care not to touch himself or indulge his more hormonal and lustful impulses: making tea, watching telly, anything he can think to do to keep himself busy, distracted... It won't do him any favors to touch himself, or get off thinking of the boy he will never have. For one thing, the omega isn't sure once he starts down that road that he will ever be able to stop, even if it means lying in his bed groaning and curling inward in himself with each cramp, his dick hard with arousal and neglected need, red and leaking clear pre-cum onto his stomach and the sheet with each trembling exhale. Agony, but relief isn't an option.

"Christ, Harry you look like fucking shit, it's been too long since you've been through a heat, at least let me call someone for yeh," his friend offers when he calls him later that afternoon.

"No," Harry shakes his head, even as his normally perfectly trained hair has begun to stick to his forehead from sweat no matter how much he's turned down the thermostat. "I don't want-"

"I'm not talking about what yeh want you git, I'm talking about giving your body what it needs. A heat after so long without one is hard enough without..."

"No," Harry refuses once more. "Thank you, but no, I'll be fine. I'll see you in a few days," Harry offers by way of goodbye before disconnecting, giving in and with a stretch pulling open the bedside table to retrieve a familiar cashmere and merino scarf, burying his face in it and inhaling the faint scent with a soft whimper.

Harry _knows_ what it is he needs, and isn't it just so damned and laughably cliché that he'd figure it out _now_ \- after he's spoiled any chances of ever having it.

………………………………………

The marines ain't so bad, as Eggsy finds out. Tough sure, but he'd expected as much. Nobody much cares that he's a pleb. Well, nobody important anyway. They're all more or less on equal footing in boot camp, if Eggsy can keep up then it doesn't much matter if he came from Alexandria or Kensington. And Eggsy finds he can keep up with some of the best of them thanks to his gymnastics training, even if it has been several years since Dean's let him practice honing those skills. He learns most everything else fast enough, and finds he rather enjoys the opportunity to start over; become his own man.

Nobody here knows or cares that he presented late, or has any expectations of him except that he gives a minimum 100%, if not for himself, then for the rest of his unit. Alpha, omega, or beta, they are quickly forming the kind of bond through their trials by fire that each would die for the other, and it's near becoming the kind of loyalty and family Eggsy has only found in Jamal and Ryan, and spent a good portion of his life up to now longing and searching for. So of course that's when his mum calls the barracks in hysterics looking for him.

"You're whot," he asks pressing the receiver closer to his ear while his heart plummets, even as he know he hasn't misheard her.

"I'm pregnant Eggsy," Michelle repeats sounding distressed.

"God mum," Eggsy whispers. _How could ya let that happen,_ he thinks bitterly. Are you alright, did Dean mark 'ya? What's he think about all this?"

"No, he ain't marked me. He don't want it though, but it's too late to get rid of it. We only found out the other day, I been getting sick in the mornin's." 

Eggsy thanks his lucky stars for small favors. If his mother hasn't left Dean yet, there's little hope to suggest that she ever will, but at least while the two aren't properly bonded it remains a possibility. Admittedly less so with a child involved, _but maybe not if Dean truly doesn't want the pup..._ Eggsy resists the urge to flinch as his mum refers to the new life growing within her with such a cold and detached-sounding pronoun, and thinks, but doesn't ask how she would know about morning sickness when before he'd left she was lucky to be conscious for any part of the morning. _If she's so far along they can't terminate the pregnancy though, the baby should be more than an 'it' at this point..._ Perhaps it's his mothers way of distancing herself.

"Mum," the alpha hedges, but Michelle cuts him off before he can even get his question out.

"Can't you come home, Eggsy? Family leave, or somethin'? I need 'ya here sweetheart."

 _Half the guys he's met have mates expecting pups, and Eggsy's not seen a one try to shirk what they signed on for, minus the day the pup is actually arriving so it can imprint on them along with the mothers._ If he cuts out now, not even for a mate, but for his mother who is well past old enough to either be caring for herself or finding an acceptable mate to help her do so? He's going to be a laughing stock, _not to mention he's likely volunteering himself to being a human punching bag for his stepfather and his mates when he returns to the flats..._

"I'm so scared Eggsy," his mother continues voice cracking. "You was 'ere one day and gone the next. You been gone for months now-" Eggsy fleetingly wonders just how many months it took for her to notice. _Did she ever?_ He supposes it could just as easily have been Dean bitching about losin' his errand boy that brought her son's absence to her attention...

"I had to find out from your mates where you was, an' I'm terrified one of these days you're just gonna be gone for good. I can't lose you like I did your father," she continues pleading.

"I can't have some stranger comin' to my door and tellin' me my baby's dead. I won't survive it again. I can't go through it twice. It nearly killed me the first time. They never even tol' us how it was your father died- you remember? Classified- they said. We never even got his body to bury."

"Mum, it ain't like that. I-"

"It is, I'm gonna lose you exactly like I did 'im! An' then what'll I have left?"

 _You'll have your new pup,_ Eggsy thinks, but prevents himself from blurting out. Sure, it'll be Dean's pup too, but even so, a pup is nothing to turn ones nose up at. It's a sense of purpose, someone to love and to love you... It occurs to Eggsy, however, if Dean doesn't want this baby and it's too late to terminate the pregnancy through professional and healthy channels, he might well seek less traditional and ethical methods. And Michelle doesn't sound all that stable at the moment. It could be hormones, but it could just as easily be withdrawal. And that's _if_ she's stopped using everythin' now she knows there's a lil' one on the way.

 _ **Christ.**_ Ridiculous or not, he has to risk looking like a bloody coward, and losin' his new peers respect. He has to get back home for the sake of his future little brother or sister.

"Alrigh' Mum, alrigh'. Calm down. Take a breather, yea? I'll do whatever I hav'ta to come home. Quick as I can, alrigh'? You just sit tight, take care 'a yourself and the baby."

………………………………………

Dean is the same asshole he's always been, but Eggsy isn't the same 18-year-old he was before enlisting. Yeah he's still a bit short by most alpha standards, but he's had three square meals a day, and months of training to help him bulk up a bit and put some more strength in those muscles, he's learned how to fight properly in addition to the kind of scrapping his life before the marines has taught him. Point being, Eggsy just might be able to take on his stepfather now, _and Dean knows it._ And from the moment Eggsy gets a look at the lil' jellybean on the monitor in the doctor's office at Michelle's appointment Eggsy's knows his life as he knows it will never be the same. He's imprinted on this already infinitely precious little girl, and he will do anything and everything too keep her safe. 

Eggsy doesn't quite know what that will mean yet, but he's determined this time not to fuck it up. And it ain't because some small part of him still wants to prove to an older omega who's probably long since stopped thinkin' about him that he can take care of someone. Well, it ain't _just_ that at least. Because it's been over a year now, and still being hung up on a man who clearly doesn't want him would just be... _Fuckin' pitiful_. It's bigger than that though, less selfish than that. Eggsy will do anything to make sure that his little sister has a better life than he has: never feels the kind of loneliness he's suffered with a neglectful mother, and abusive stepfather. His little sister will always know and never be left to doubt that she's loved and wanted, most of all by her big brother. Dean will never lay a hand on her, _Eggsy will **die** first._

Admittedly dropping out of the marines, and having one other job for your resume that lasted a little over 2 months time doesn't exactly recommend you for much. But Eggsy doesn't give up, finally taking up a job pushin' a broom at his old school, because they always need janitors. It ain't a great paycheck, but it is a paycheck, 'sides he's not about to crawl back to the tailor shop, and risking running into Harry. He starts puttin' away what he can for later, and buying all the things his new little sister will need when she gets there: clothes, a bassinet, binkies, blankies, nappies, formula... 

He starts readin' books about pregnancy and baby care on his lunches at work. His coworkers tease him a but for that, say he's doing his omega's job. Thing is though, the world doesn't open up and swallow him whole. As much as he always feared what would happen when he finally did present, Eggsy isn't all that threatened by being mistaken for or teased because he does things most would assign to an omega. Shirking traditional roles and expectations neither shocks, nor repulses him, and he's grown enough since the first time he walked these halls, even if it wasn't all that long ago, not to care what most other people think. Because his mother migh' not be the best example 'a one anymore, but Eggsy knows bein' an omega doesn't inherently make 'ya weak. _Of course the last one he liked and respected completely broke his heart,_ but Harry Hart was anything but weak. It was probably stupid misconceptions like that that made the older man hide what he was in the firs' place. 

Eggsy waits 'till he knows Dean will be out for awhile and finds all the liquor and drug stashes in the flat. He knows logically he can't get rid of it, even if he can take his stepfather now this isn't the battle to choose with him, not when there are sure to be plenty more and worthier causes, but he can at least hide it someplace his mum won't have to look at it and be tempted. By the end of the month, and with no small amount of effort Michelle Unwin has detoxed, and is abstaining from everything the OB has recommended she avoid with the exception of her cigarettes. Eggsy gets the impression she might just be starting to regret asking him to come back home again, that she resents him, and the new burgeoning life inside of her for keeping her from her usual methods of escaping her day to day life, her husband, and whatever else turned her into the shell she's become since being widowed.

To be fair, Eggsy isn't exactly terribly fond of the situation either, although for entirely different reasons. His mum is already several months along, and was still using various substances before he can back home. Eggsy will love his sister no matter how she turns out, but it's hard to think _if only he had known sooner..._ he might have given her that much better and healthier of a start in life. And much as he'd love to be proud of Michelle for quitting all that harmful stuff, they both know it isn't for good. Just yesterday Eggsy had to resort to using his alpha voice and posturing to cow her into pouring a bottle of wine down the sink rather than draining it herself.

Michelle Unwin is not a fit mother, is the point. And Eggsy knows it. He's known-intimately- and for years that she wasn't in a fit state to raise him, and she's even less so for his little sister on the way. That protective instinct- whether it comes from being an alpha, or simply the prospect of being a big brother, eats at him. He can't let tha' little angel live like this. And it's in that moment that Eggsy understands what keeping his little sister safe will really mean; keeping her from her biological parents.

Eggsy has never been more secretive, more careful about anything in his entire life. He can't risk Dean finding out what he intends to do. His stepfather doesn't give a damn about his pup, _but if he realizes just how much Eggsy does, and that the younger alpha is seeking to wrest her from him and his Mum's grasp..._ Well Eggsy doesn't want to find out what he might do, but he wouldn't put anything past him. It's only a bleeding shame that the baby girl will have to spend any time with them at all, but after he's helped clean his mum up, they'll need evidence of an unsafe home before they can have her removed and Eggsy can fight to keep her with him instead of her bein' turned out to a group home or somethin'. But it's the lesser of two evils: shielding her from her parents in their little flat is better than risking the pup's health letting his mum slip again. 

So Eggsy will do whatever he has to do; and in the meantime, very quietly, very carefully, far away from any of his stepfather's prying eyes or ears, he puts a little of his paycheck each week into an investigator and a lawyer to build his case, and starts looking for a decent and affordable flat.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, be mindful of the tags. I don't want to spoil any of the important plot points by being over-zealous with them, but I have attempted to list any possible triggers, and will update them if I think of any more as this story progresses.
> 
> This will be an incredibly slow burn, so those of you who are here for Hartwin, bear with me it is coming. (Any non-con or underage sex in this narrative as is warned about in the tags is not taking place between Eggsy and Harry.)
> 
> Want a peek behind the scenes of writing these stories? Got a prompt or idea for a fic you'd like to see? Drop me a note on my Tumblr: [afangirlreadsfics](http://www.afangirlreadsfics.tumblr.com)

"You still look like shit," Merlin says greeting Harry at the tube entrance when he returns to HQ four agonizing days later.

"Thanks," Harry nods unenthusiastically.

They can't talk about it. _Not here._ It is a spy organization afterall, eyes and ears could be anywhere, even if Merlin and his assistants generally account for most of them. The official story is that agent Galahad was stricken with a particularly nasty virus that's been going around, and now he's no longer contagious and finally on the mend is back on duty again. That being the cover, it's not necessarily such a bad thing he looks a little less put together than usual, even if it's driving Harry up a wall. It might just help sell the story.

No, the truly troublesome and maddening thing of it is: this heat caught the older omega completely off-guard, and there's really no way to tell if this was some kind of freak occurrence, or his hormones have suddenly woken up again. And not knowing if, or when your body might betray you, and cause you to lose a good portion of your control, is at the very least incredibly unnerving.

What's more, Harry is all but sure of why this heat in particular came on so strong, and there's nothing he can do about it.

"Harry," the other man begins when the pair have both retired to his house for the evening, because _of course_ Merlin has noticed too, Harry sighs.

"No Merlin," Harry shakes his head already sure of where this conversation is headed. "A few months ago you were saying anything to convince me to distance myself from him. Now all of a sudden I have a rough heat and you're suggesting I get back in touch after I've utterly crushed him?"

"Both of which I did because I care about you. And yes, you're heat was all of a sudden, which is why I'm concerned. It's been more than a year since the last time you had one."

"A fluke."

"And if it's not," Merlin asks. "Even if we start you back on suppressants-"

"Already did." The other man shoots him a pointed look.

"They're not easy on the body at-"

"Don't say it."

"-our age." Now it's Harry turn to glare.

"That didn't improve or soften it much."

"Point still stands, you stubborn, impossible bastard."

"No," Harry replies again. "Eggsy's-"

"In the same shite situation he was the last time the two of you spoke."

"What? I don't understand, how-"

"Look I don't make a habit of saying this, and your ego doesn't need the help so I'm not gonna repeat it which means you better listen well enough the first time: you were right. You aren't the only one who's walking around with Lee's ghost. I suppose I didn't want to know how badly we failed him, so I didn't look too much into it. I couldn't bring myself to, but after what happened that night... Eggsy deserves better than the hand he's been dealt and it's a crime we didn't do more for him and Michelle after Lee died. So I kept tabs. Seems he dropped out of the marines a few weeks back, and he's recently returned to the living with his mother and step-father."

"But why would he do that, his marks-"

"I knew you wouldn't be able to resist checking up on him." He'd nearly crowed the words, but given the situation there wasn't much to celebrate in being right, except perhaps that there might- with some effort- be a way for both his best friend and the young boy to be happy. 

"No," Harry interrupts just as the other man opens his mouth to speak again. "The answer is still no."

"Harry," Merlin continues undeterred. "We both know it's entirely possible this heat wasn't so random."

"It doesn't matter."

"But if he's your mate-"

"I'm still a Kingsmen, which means pretending to be an alpha. I would never be able to publicly acknowledge him as my mate," the omega replies tersely.

"Then perhaps you ought to think about retirement. Don't you look at me like that, you and I both know too well there's only two ways out of Kingsmen: retiring your use of the codename, or a forcible and permeant retirement."

"He'd still be tying himself down with an old man. Anyway what about when it comes to retiring your codename-you use it more than your actual name."

"Never you mind me, your parents didn't saddle you with a name like Rupert, did they? But that's a nice attempt at a deflection, Harry. Anyway, your age didn't bother Eggsy a few months ago when he came on to you," the technician points out with a raised and incredulous eyebrow.

"That's because he's not thinking it through. He's young and idealistic."

"Aye, and who gave him those ideas? You said it yourself he never aspired to much or put any effort in before you took an interest. I'd be willing to be he's put quite a bit of thought in, you're not giving your boy enough credit."

"He's not mine, Merlin."

"Aye, but would you like him to be?"

………………………………………

Daisy is perfect. Admittedly Eggsy isn't sure how anyone claims that their newborn is ' _beautiful_ ', because mostly before they clean her up a bit she looks like a kind of slimey potato, but Eggsy has no doubt, even with Dean's genes in play, that this little girl is going to be stealing hearts one day, just like she's already stolen his. The young alpha watches both mystified and completely in love with this brand new pup as her tiny fingers wrap around and clasp his one, head burrowing into him as close as she can manage, as if she'd like nothing better than to simply melt into her big brother's chest. 

"Hi my lil' flower," Eggsy whispers softly, mesmerized by the slow rise and fall of her chest as she breathes. "I'm your big brother." Daisy makes a small kind of a humming sound of acknowledgement and contentment against him, and Eggsy knows with even more certainty than before that he will do anything to protect and care for his little sister. 

"I'm the guy that's gonna protect and love 'ya so much no man is ever gonna be good enough for 'ya," he jokes as he gently rocks back and forth on the balls of his feet with the tiny baby girl.

Eggsy follows as they take his little sister down the hall, watching through the glass as they perform their tests, and give her her shots and the like. He's too enthralled, watching protectively over his newly adopted charge to even notice the other man approaching until he stops up short next to him at the window.

"She's a little fighter, isn't she," the bald, bespectacled man observes watching as the nurse is forced to redouble her efforts to gently restrain the baby while they put on the sensors to perform her hearing test.

"She's an Unwin," Eggsy replies softly. 

"Not a Baker," the man asks, curiously.

"Not for too much longer," the younger man replies before finally glancing sideways to the other, though he's still careful to keep his little sister in the corner of his eye.

"I don't expect you remember who I-"

"I do," Eggsy interrupts nodding. "I mean, you never gave me a name or nothin', but you was at Har- Mr. Hart's when I stopped by wif his Christmas present."

"Merlin," the older man introduces, offering his hand to shake.

"Like the wizard, sword in the stone and all that bit," Eggsy asks a bit incredulously even as he shakes the offered hand.

"The same."

"You're havin' me on, aren't ya'? Yer mum and da' named you Merlin?"

"No, they made a mistake, gave me the wrong name- like your sister, Merlin's the name I've decided to keep for myself."

"O-kay," Eggsy nods slowly, because yeah sometimes parents are shite with names, but he still thinks Merlin is kinda a silly one. "So what do 'ya want wif me, Merlin, or is one of the pups in there one 'a yours." The older man shakes his head. "If you're here 'cause of Mr. Hart," Eggsy begins a bit defensively.

"Harry doesn't know that I'm here," Merlin interjects. And _that_ certainly gets Eggsy's attention.

"Yea' so whatcha want then?"

"It's not what I want," Merlin replies shaking his head once more. "It's what _you_ want. You've been trying to work towards getting custody of this pup before she was even born," he gestures to little Daisy as they begin removing the sensors to wrap her back up once more.

"How could you-"

"Don't worry, you've done an admirable job of hiding it, I'm just better at finding things. That, and you unwittingly I'm sure, happened to employ a colleague of mine to build a case against your stepfather." It was as good a cover as any, and believable enough the young man would probably swallow it.

"You're going to need some character references, for the trial once you move forward with your petition for custody."

"And?"

"Have you got any yet?"

"You offerin'," Eggsy asks confused.

"I am, in fact."

"Why the hell would you want 'ta do that? What d'you care whether I get my sister or not?"

"Because I knew your father, and I owe him my life," Merlin replies seriously.

………………………………………

A revelation like that requires a proper conversation, and most of Eggsy's attention, but even so he's loathe to leave Daisy alone in the nursery even for a moment. Which is silly, Dean didn't have any desire to be here and isn't likely to turn up, and the nurses and doctors are sure to be qualified enough to look after his little sister.

"Do you trust me," Merlin asks, sending his hesitation.

"I hardly know you mate," Eggsy replies, although strangely enough for some reason or other it seems he does trust the other man. That doesn't mean he has to tell him though.

"Fair enough, may I borrow your phone for just a moment."

"Uhhh..." Eventually if for no other reason than to appease the impatient expression on the Scot's face Eggsy hands it over. A few minutes of furious typing on it later and Merlin is handing it back to him only for the young man to find he's staring at what seems to be a live video feed of his Dais'. "How the 'ell did 'ya do that?"

"One of my many skills," the older man smirks softly. Eggsy's willing to bet this skill is probably a little less than legal, but he supposes people who make a living gathering information on others find loopholes for this sort of thing. "Now you can be certain she's perfectly safe so we can talk," he offers. "Shall we grab some tea, perhaps?"

"Yea' alrigh'," Eggsy nods. Honestly for a conversation about his dead father Eggsy reckons a beer would be better, but there's no way the cafeteria serves that and he's not leaving Daisy, even if he can watch her on his phone now.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, be mindful of the tags. I don't want to spoil any of the important plot points by being over-zealous with them, but I have attempted to list any possible triggers, and will update them if I think of any more as this story progresses.
> 
> This will be an incredibly slow burn, so those of you who are here for Hartwin, bear with me it is coming. (Any non-con or underage sex in this narrative as is warned about in the tags is not taking place between Eggsy and Harry.)
> 
> Want a peek behind the scenes of writing these stories? Got a prompt or idea for a fic you'd like to see? Drop me a note on my Tumblr: [afangirlreadsfics](http://www.afangirlreadsfics.tumblr.com)

"Harry didn't think after the last exchange the two of you had that you would be open to his help. But I'm sure he would be more than willing to be a character witness for you if you want-"

"No,"Eggsy replies shortly, cutting the other man off before he can even finish his thought. "I don't want his help." Merlin nods, but doesn't look surprised or offended in the least, rather as if he was expecting this response too. "You said you knew my Da'," Eggsy prompts, as they set down with their tea.

"Yes I did," Merlin seems to hesitate for a moment now, which throws Eggsy. The other man was the one to being his father up in the first place, surely he must-

"It's still very much classified, a lot of the things we did for Queen and country," Merlin finally admits, looking rather apologetic. "But your father and I served together, and the day he died he caught something no one else in our entire team did, gave his life to save all of ours."

"You should know that while that decision was made in an instant, Lee talked about you and your mother more than any other subject. I don't believe he ever meant to leave you both, or would have done if he didn't think he was doing it for the right reasons, and with the hopes of protecting you both from the sorts of people and evils we were fighting back then."

"Thank you," Eggsy manages softly, fingers wrapped tightly around his tea, and the young man finds that he genuinely means it. Even if Merlin can't give him much in the way of specifics, it's nice to speak to someone who knew his father, and can assure him that he always meant to come home to his wife and mate, and their young son. It doesn't fix the way Michelle has allowed herself to fall into scumbags like Dean Baker, or become the neglectful mother he can now acknowledge she's been with him. The sort of mother he won't allow to raise and otherwise ruin his already precious flower. If anything this only strengthens his revolve to get himself, and his newborn sister away from her and all of it, but it bolsters him to know that his father might have been the kind of alpha to stop at nothing for his family, his pack, too.

"Where are you working now, Eggsy," Merlin asks, although the older man already knows the answer, nodding agreeably at regular intervals, making conversation, and offering advice about what the young alpha can do to strengthen his case when the time comes to petition for custody of his sister.

"You'll have to win, once you file, Eggsy," Merlin points out after some time. "Or your stepfather will do his utmost to make sure you aren't able to make a case again." Eggsy nods, he knew that, but it is another thing to hear the words from someone else, aloud. "But it can be done," Merlin assures him, "And you aren't wrong in feeling that it should be. Daisy is incredibly lucky to have you. Any omega would be too."

 _Yes lad, even Harry,_ the older man thinks when he spots the tiniest glimmer of hope spark in the other's eyes at the mention of earning an omega's respect, esteem, and devotion. It's so obvious now, what he missed before, why his old friend might have become so attached. And even without the knowledge that Eggsy is a perfect enough candidate for Harry's alpha that he's brought back the man's heats, Merlin can see where their personalities, traits, and quirks might knit together beautifully. 

………………………………………

"You did _what_?"

"I saw Eggsy today," Merlin replies as casually as if he were commenting on the weather. 

"You sought him out, you mean. Why, when I expressly said..."

"Oh get over yourself, it was years overdue. Anyway, I didn't visit him to fix the mess between you both and play matchmaker."

"Alright, so why did you go to see him, then?"

"Because he needs help, but he doesn't know who to ask for it. He's imprinted," Merlin begins explaining, and suddenly Harry's face and heart drop simultaneously. It doesn't happen often, but it's not entirely unheard of, that an alpha can have more than one suitable mate sometimes leaving one poor omega unrequited or left to find a less fulfilling partnership. There are exceptions of course, alphas with more than one partner, but Harry won't share, no matter how hard his heats might be without Eggsy. "He needs help fighting for custody of his baby sister."

"His sister," Harry repeats a bit too slowly, coming back to himself as Merlin continues speaking. So it's not a mate he's imprinted on then, but a pup. There may still be some hope yet.

"I suspect that's his primary reason for dropping from the marines and returning home," Merlin nods, mercifully choosing not to comment on the obvious disappointment and jealousy that had surged through the omega at the thought of the young alpha with someone else.

"He still cares, you know."

"I thought you said you didn't see him to play matchmaker? Anyway, how do you come to that conclusion, he turned down my offer to help didn't he," Harry asks a bit frustratedly.

"Well I believe I did say he'd be more likely to take you up on it if you were to meet and offer him your help in person."

"Yes, because that worked so well last time. He didn't even want to see me while he was sitting in jail," the older omega replies voice dripping with disbelief and sarcasm.

"He's trying to prove that he's capable of handling and taking care of himself."

"And his sister," Harry supplies, but Merlin shakes his head.

"No, I don't believe so. He could prove his independence and self-reliance any number of ways, but Daisy isn't some kind of pawn or his guinea pig. He's determined to get her away from his mother and stepfather's influence and neglect."

"Daisy Baker," Harry tests out.

" _Unwin_. Eggsy was quite insistent about that, evidently his mother got it wrong on her birth certificate," Merlin smiles softly, clearly fond. "He'd already kill for that little girl. He wouldn't even talk to me until I hacked the hospital's security feeds so he could keep an eye on her."

"You always wanted pups," Merlin adds softly, with a pointed look.

"I've never said-" his friend levels him a look which clearly says that he didn't have to say anything for him to know this information.

"It doesn't change anything," Harry mutters darkly, a slight scowl forming, as he shakes his head.

"No, I don't imagine it does, and why should it? She's as good as his own pup."

"I don't mean the pup."

"I know what you meant you bull-headed bastard. And I also know you are stilling thinking of- and care about him. You haven't stopped thinking about him since he ran away from you months ago."

"Our work, our lives are too dangerous for families."

"So retire. Or don't, James and Percy seem to be doing just fine with Roxy," Merlin counters. "You could have Eggsy, could have a family, if you wanted, Harry. It doesn't take a genius to see that young man is still very much hung up on you, try as he might to pretend otherwise. It's simply a matter of deciding to take that risk and put the effort in. You deserve to be happy just as much as he does."

"I- I can't." Merlin sighs, and shakes his head.

………………………………………

Merlin moves in while Eggsy a moving out, breaking in to the flat while all it's occupants are out and otherwise busy to install copious cameras and microphones in the place to watch over the young man's infant sister until he can make his move. It isn't Eggsy's first choice of course, leaving her alone, even for a moment with his mum and Dean, but it could be the best way to convince the courts he's the right man to raise her. If he's under the same roof he can't just watch her suffer or be neglected and do nothing, but if he picks up their slack the courts won't see the hurt in her remaining Daisy Baker, and in the custody of her parents.

"It's only for a lil' while," Eggsy promised softly with a grieved expression, before he finally said goodbye to the flat he's called home for so many years. "I hate doin' it. It's gonna kill me leavin' 'ya here, but I'm comin' back for 'ya my flower. 'Cuz that's what 'ya are, _my_ flower, don't matter that they was the ones that made you, not if they can't take care of 'ya proper. An' when big bruva comes back, I'm takin' 'ya wif me, an' I'll never leave 'ya again, that's a promise," he assures her, kissing her cheek before bringing her in to his mum to load into her stroller for their trip to the shops.

It isn't difficult to prove the home environment isn't a good one. Everyone in the flats knows the kinda things Dean and his mates get up to, and the sort of states Michelle is usually in. The trouble is nobody likes a snitch, but Merlin assures him he's found enough people to testify on his behalf that half of the battle is as good as won. That doesn't mean the young alpha is any less nervous about it all however, meeting with Merlin as often as the older man can to go over the case they are building.

Harry does his best not to be jealous, because being jealous is ridiculous. Merlin is an alpha, and not remotely interested in Eggsy that way, and Harry really has no right to be. Eggsy had offered himself to him on a silver platter and he'd rejected him-cruelly, and he'd made no attempts to see or speak to him again since the police station. Because Eggsy is just ( _and finally_ ) getting his life back on track, moving forward in a positive direction, and Harry can't hold him back from it, he'd never be able to forgive himself. If only Merlin would leave it at that.

"I just don't understand it, is all," he replies looking annoyed. "That night you found out what it was he was doing, you risked everything. You didn't care if Arthur found out, or you lost it all, you were hellbent on finding and protecting Eggsy, even from himself. An' now you won't even try to see or talk to him."

"He made it perfectly clear he didn't want or need my help then, and he's told you as much now. He doesn't want anything to do with me, Merlin."

"He does," Merlin counters. "Heaven knows why, but he does. You don't ask that much after someone you don't care nothing for, even if he mistakenly thinks he's bein' subtle about it," the other man argues. "But I can't make you see what yeh don't want to."

"I thought you might have cared for him, but maybe you just liked the idea of rescuing him. Now he's working on becoming more self-reliant and independent, he's not so attractive anymore?"

Harry's fist curls, fingernails biting ever so slightly into the palm of his hand, but no, reacting like that would be exactly the kind of confirmation of his attachment to Eggsy that his old friend is looking for, and he won't give him the satisfaction. It doesn't matter what He felt or presently feels for Eggsy, he's not going to let anything come of it. 

"You're my best friend Harry, so you know I say this out of love and care for you, but your a fucking idiot," he sighs shaking his head as he takes his leave to head home.

………………………………………

Merlin won't tell him how Eggsy is doing anymore, despite the fact Harry knows the two are continuing to meet regularly. Harry suspects by now the two of them have and indulge in talking about more than just the court case Eggsy has finally filed for to seek custody of his baby sister, that the two may even have become something resembling friends, but if he's going to continue to be 'pig-headed' about the whole Eggsy-situation, Merlin refuses to play intermediary any more.

"I know you probably think you're being noble somehow, but if he _is_ your mate then it's not just yourself you're denying and hurting by keeping him at a distance," Merlin warns him when he'd tried to ask after the younger man. "I can't let you do that, to him or yourself. You're going to have to make a decision."

So Harry does, and it's clear Merlin thinks it's the wrong one, but Harry dives back into every mission Arthur will throw his way. He makes a point of being gone, and off-grid as much as possible, because maybe if he can't spy or look in on Eggsy for long enough when he has easy access and opportunity again he'll be better equipped to resist the the temptation. The suppressants do their job of keeping his hormones in check, but his unexpected heat was not the one-off he had hoped it was. During a mission in Russia he can feel it- the suppressants let him keep his mind, mask his pheromones, but there is a familiar and undeniable tightness just beneath the skin, and a sense of desire and longing he can't shake for the life of him. _It'll pass_ , he reminds himself, and it does as it always has, but his feelings for Eggsy remain, as strong as they've ever been. It's been nearly two years now since the two of them last saw or spoke to one another, and that's probably two years too late.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, be mindful of the tags. I don't want to spoil any of the important plot points by being over-zealous with them, but I have attempted to list any possible triggers, and will update them if I think of any more as this story progresses.
> 
> This will be an incredibly slow burn, so those of you who are here for Hartwin, bear with me it is coming. (Any non-con or underage sex in this narrative as is warned about in the tags is not taking place between Eggsy and Harry.)
> 
> Want a peek behind the scenes of writing these stories? Got a prompt or idea for a fic you'd like to see? Drop me a note on my Tumblr: [afangirlreadsfics](http://www.afangirlreadsfics.tumblr.com)

Eggsy slowly forces himself to stop asking Merlin about Harry, not because he doesn't want to know, or doesn't care how the older man and omega is doing anymore, so much as he probably cares entirely too much. And it can't be healthy, can it? He can't keep asking after and waiting around for the older omega who's clearly not coming after him. He'd told him to fuck off and that's exactly what Harry's done.

Besides Harry had flat out told him he didn't care for Eggsy that way, didn't want him as his alpha. And Eggsy doesn't think he could bear having him around, but not actually having him as his own. Anyway he has other demands on him now, has other things to focus on: a baby girl who's every bit as smitten with him as he is with her. _Not to say that Daisy is simply a substitute, or a well-timed distraction, but she does have a way of making his world feel a little less vast and lonely._

The young alpha hates that taking care of his sister means fighting his own mother for her. It isn't the way it should be for a child, but at least Daisy is young enough that she won't remember any of this ugly business. If all goes according to plan, so far as she will know until she's old enough to understand, her big brother Eggsy will have always been her caregiver, her guardian and protector.

Eggsy doesn't truly wish his mother any ill; no matter how much she may have hurt or disappointed him, he knows she never actually meant to. He knows she's an addict, and what's more addicted to escaping certain truths of her reality and life since her first husband's death. But when she arrives with blown pupils and bloodshot eyes in court minutes before the session without her husband, and with familiar, poorly concealed bruises on her face, Eggsy knows their case is all but made. It still take everything in him, and Merlin's gentle but firm grip on his knee to keep him from jumping across the aisle and snatching up his lil' flower though, just to make sure she hasn't suffered her father's ill-temper as well.

Dean does in fact show up, late, and it's clear his mind is mostly somewhere else. No doubt a new source of someone to drop off his deliveries now he's lost his stepson. Eggsy has done everything in his power to see to it that nobody knows where his new place is now, but he's already been granted and had someone serve a restraining order for Dean and his mates. He's not about to take any chances. One wiff of them near the new flat he's making a home for him and Daisy and he won't hesitate calling the coppers. And Merlin, because he'd made him promise.

Eggsy would never have imagined a few weeks ago when the older man had approached him in the hospital the two might become so close. Afterall he was one of Harry's friends. A close one, perhaps even his best friend from what he had been able to glean from Merlin's passing comments about the omega. Surely he was meant to take Harry's in all of this. Harry must have told him that he was arrested, and what he was arrested for, but Merlin had never once made him feel as though he were being pitied or looked down upon, had gone above and beyond to help him in any way he could to get established and without taking away from his sense of independence and accomplishment. He was a godsend, really. The sort of miracle Eggsy had long since stopped believing in.

And his calm posture and pheromones where exactly what the young man needed to keep his head as Dean swaggered over to the table to take a seat beside his mum. Eggsy would have liked nothing better than to rip his grubby paws off his mum, and if he so much as touched that little pup he's imprinted on, well... but now wasn't really the time, and so long as his mother continued to allow Dean in her life, tolerated him touching her, there was only so much he or the law could do about it. Daisy can't defend or speak up for herself yet though, and Eggsy will do whatever he can, whatever he has to in order to keep her safe.

Eggsy figures his stepfather is only here contesting the case because he doesn't want Eggsy to get what he wants, because his stepfather made it abundantly clear from the start he never wanted a pup, and he's shown no love for little Daisy since, even if she is his, biologically speaking at least. But Eggsy's stolen a source of his income by getting away from the estates, from Dean and his gang's clutches, if his stepfather doesn't at least make a show of trying to stand up to and stop Eggsy challenging him he might lose his standing as the top Alpha of his crew. He can't win his case, but at least if he tries he can blame a 'faulty' legal system or a bad judge.

After both sides have been heard his honor tells Michelle and Dean they are fortunate the state isn't pursuing their own charges for neglect and abuse against them. The case Merlin helped Eggsy and his lawyer to build have more than adequately proved Daisy is neither safe or well-cared for in her current home, and that Eggsy has established a suitable alternative and has the means to care for his little sister. Michelle hands the small infant pup over to Eggsy without comment and is quickly swept away by her husband as soon as the judge dismisses them, while Eggsy, careful not to squash or endanger his little sister takes Merlin by surprise with a fierce and appreciative one-armed hug.

"Thank you," he whispers relieved, tears filling his green eyes as he turns his attention once more to the perfect little pup in his arms. "Thank you Merlin."

………………………………………

It isn't that Merlin is ashamed of Eggsy Unwin and his little sister, Harry knows, because you don't go to the trouble of framing a photo you don't actually enjoy looking at, but the quartermaster and handler does his best to tuck it out of sight in a drawer whenever he knows he will be stopping in. Harry had halted mid-speech and entirely lost his train of thought the first time he had spotted it, and Merlin had taken to hiding it where possible ever since. Harry shouldn't miss it, really it was just torturing himself, no matter how handsome and happy the alpha looked holding the tiny pup in his arms. He'd made his decision, it was a bit late to be having second thoughts about it now.

It's only by accident that Harry hears about his friend's new appointment and title. He'd happened to be passing by when Percival had been asksing about the other man's goddaughter, and there's only one little girl he could be referring to. Kingsmen don't make a habit of forming attachments except perhaps to each other, and Merlin doesn't have any surviving family. It's fitting really. Merlin may have been slow on the uptake where seeing Eggsy's need for someone looking out for him was concerned, but once he seemed to realize his mistake he was clearly doing everything he could to make up for lost time. And if anything were ever to happen to Eggsy, Merlin is stable, dependable, and has a great protective streak a mile long for those under his care and in his charge. Merlin might not talk to Harry about the Unwins anymore, but it requires none of his training or years of experience in espionage to see he's grown very fond both of little Daisy, and her big brother.

And Harry's happy for all of them, he is. Which is why despite the initial traitorous leap of hope the thought had inspired, he does everything he can to try and get out of his latest assignment down from Arthur once he's seen his class list. He's to play the role of a college professor this time, in the hopes of getting close to one Dr. James Arnold, who's reappeared without a scratch and quite as if nothing's happened just hours after their Lancelot died trying to rescue him from his kidnappers.

Harry does his level-best to offer up several good reasons for giving the mission to another agent, but the fact of the matter is Percival is the only other knight available, and everyone knows cool and collected as he seems he won't be able to remain impartial if there's a chance Arnold is in any way responsible for the death of his longtime friend and lover. And Arthur is not inclined to be patient or granting Harry any favors after having failed to produce a suitable candidate to fill the vacancy.

For a moment he had considered Eggsy. With his former Marine training, his gymnastics, his drive to do good and look out for others, the young man would be an almost perfect candidate for the job, no matter what any of the others might have said about his background or class status, but Harry couldn't do it. Eggsy has moved on, made a new life for himself with his little sister, and he's fairly certain from cursory surveillance he definitely shouldn't be indulging in- that the young alpha is dating now too. Eggsy's not about to welcome his sudden reappearance or any meddling on Harry's part now.

But it seems, despite his best efforts Harry's going to once again be forced into seeing and wedging himself into the young alpha's life one way or another, whether he likes it or not, because the roster for the class he will be teaching while he's gathering intel on Arnold includes one 'Gary Unwin'.

"You didn't think it might be... I don't know, important information for me to know he was going to be in my class," Harry demands later that evening when he manages to catch Merlin after he's wrapped up handling Percival's latest mission.

"I'd say the more important question here is what you are going to do about it, since I didn't have anything to do with assigning you a mission where you'd have to see and maybe talk to the young man you've spent the last few years avoiding," Merlin replied evenly, shaking his head, before taking his leave of headquarters for the evening.

" _Fuck_ ," Harry muttered.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, be mindful of the tags. I don't want to spoil any of the important plot points by being over-zealous with them, but I have attempted to list any possible triggers, and will update them if I think of any more as this story progresses.
> 
> This will be an incredibly slow burn, so those of you who are here for Hartwin, bear with me it is coming. (Any non-con or underage sex in this narrative as is warned about in the tags is not taking place between Eggsy and Harry.)
> 
> Want a peek behind the scenes of writing these stories? Got a prompt or idea for a fic you'd like to see? Drop me a note on my Tumblr: [afangirlreadsfics](http://www.afangirlreadsfics.tumblr.com)

Harry doesn't sleep the night before his first class. He can't. The older omega still can't decide upon a plan or what it is he will say when he is forced to see Eggsy after having spent the better part of the last few years avoiding him. His hands which have always been rock-steady no matter what they have been tasked with doing, shake as he attempts to straighten his tie the following morning. He has to do this, needs to pull himself together, for Kingsmen, for Lancelot, and a grieving Percival who would do and give anything to be in his place on this mission. He has to keep it together and find a way to make this work, no matter how much he might be dreading it. He can do this-somehow... He has to.

 **Don't even think of letting that poor boy walk into your class unprepared** Merlin warns him via text that morning. **You tell him or I will.**

As it turns out the threat is entirely unnecessary. Eggsy's advisor sends an email to alert him that he's requested a meeting with him about the course requirements. Harry has only been given the post a few days ago, after an unfortunate "family crisis" necessitated the standing professor take a leave of absence. The change hasn't even been announced yet, so Eggsy cannot know whom he's actually requesting to meet with, but it's as good an opportunity as any for him to make his presence known to the younger Alpha. 

Eggsy is excited. It's been years since he's thought about going to school again for upper levels of education, getting some kind of degree. Not since- well he's done his best to put all that heartache and unpleasantness behind him. But Daisy has been the very boon he needed to get back on his feet, and find some sense of direction again. 

Eggsy's studying hard to become a social worker, which admittedly might not seem like the most ambitious of aspirations, but he's proud of it. It's a better wage than his custodial job, and the hours won't be too bad either. They're even letting him enroll at a discounted rate since he's an employee. But more importantly he can make a difference and do some good with his skills and instinctively protective nature. He is going to do his best with every child he is assigned to make sure they have a good and safe home where they are loved like his Dais' does. 

He's doing whatever classes and lessons he can online, but Merlin has offered to sit his sister for those classes he has to be present for, and Ryan and Jamal are happy to pick up the slack when Daisy's godfather is stuck at work. 

The young alpha is on his way to see if perhaps his history professor would be amiable to allowing him to prove he knows the materials well enough to test out of his core history course. Perhaps an exam or a thesis, so he can devote the block to another class and be that much closer to graduating. It's unorthodox, but not completely unheard of. He is just going over his persuasive arguments to make his case when Eggsy stops dead in front of the open office door, all his thoughts as well as his heart skidding to an abrupt halt. 

"Come in," Harry invites, a bit nervously when he looks up to see which of his students is already visiting his office before they've even met as a class. The young man doesn't budge from the doorframe though, seeming to be weighing out his options. "Please," Harry adds softly, and Eggsy's shoulder slump. 

"I don't suppose there are any other professors teaching the core history classes this term," the young alpha finally manages to eek out, still pointedly avoiding Harry's gaze. 

"No, I'm afraid not," Harry replies apologetically. 

It will set his graduation date back nearly a year if he doesn't take this course, and Eggsy had really wanted to start as soon as he could to begin saving for Daisy's own future education, she was growing so fast he knew it would come soon enough. 

"Uh, I was hoping to talk about sitting the exam now, or maybe writin' some kind of thesis 'ta prove I already know the course materials well enough," Eggsy stumbles through hopefully. Maybe just maybe he could be that lucky... 

"Eggsy-" Harry begins, and the young alpha locks his knees to keep them from buckling. It's been so long since he's heard that voice saying his name, but he's never forgotten it, never stopping replaying and wishing for it no matter how hard he's fought to shove away all thoughts of Harry Hart. 

"I don't wanna talk about anythin' that's happened between us before now, if that's what you was windin' up for," Eggsy interjects quickly, firmly. "An' I don't want or need any special treatment. If it isn't something you'd consider for any 'a yer other students, then forget I asked about it, alrigh'? Jus' yes or no, is there anything I can do to prove I know the material and get the credits without takin' the whole course?" 

"No, I don't have an end of term exam finalized enough for you to take it. But we can talk about a thesis if you'd like," Harry offers. 

"But we'd have to have regular meetin's and all 'a that to go over it, progress checks, an' drafts, yeah," Eggsy considers carefully. 

"That's generally how it's done, yes," the older man nods in agreement. 

"Nah," Eggsy decides shaking his head. "Thanks, but I guess I'll just be sittin' the course." _Afterall_ , Eggsy rationalizes, _it's a big enough lecture hall, he can pick a seat far enough away and bury himself in his notes well enough he won't have to look or interact with the older omega much._

"Eggsy," Harry tries again, despite not having the first idea what to say. 

"Gary," Eggsy corrects shaking his head, and Harry frowns a little, brows knitting in confusion. "You said nobody calls you that." 

"Yeah, and if I'm gonna get through this semester that's exactly what you have'ta be," Eggsy nods. "Thanks for your time professor," the alpha nods politely, taking his leave and disappearing into the throng of students just out from the last hour of classes, before Harry can say or do anything to stop him. 

Eggsy arrives to the lecture hall early and establishes himself in the farthermost row from the podium Harry will presumably spend most of his lectures standing at, beside the window: he figures he might as well have a view if he's going to be avoiding looking forward for a semester. There are plenty of other closer seats, as it seems this will be a small class of 18 or so, but if Harry notices or has a problem with his placement, he makes no comment of it. 

Harry can't ignore him, not entirely at least. It's right there in black and white in the course syllabus that while this is primarily a lecture style class participation is part of the grade, but the older omega does take special care not to call on Eggsy any more than any of his peers and classmates. Just as he does his best not to inwardly cringe when Eggsy refuses to call him anything other or less formal than ' _professor_ ' or ' _sir_ '. Because Harry knows, he's brought this upon himself. Even after Merlin admitted his mistake in advising against becoming too involved with Eggsy, Harry has never made any attempts to reach out to him and fix his mistakes. He must have overridden any fondness the younger man may have once had for him long before now. 

The older omega has long since forfeited the right when he ceased any kind of involvement with him, but Harry is very proud of Eggsy, even if there's no way of being able to tell him so. In spite of it all the young man has made a life for himself, and even for his baby sister. He's gotten out of council flats, and even still he's fighting and working for better for himself and little Daisy. Eggsy was never out of shape, but he looks... Healthier now, three square and regular meals, happiness, not to mention not living under his stepfather anymore has done him considerable good. He still has that perpetually boyish good looking face, but he looks more sturdy now, more like what one might expect of an alpha, and the omega spends a good deal of time hating himself for noticing. It feels predatory, somehow, noticing the alpha now that he's unquestionably of age and able to provide satisfactory consent. 

Harry has known for some time now that he wasn't entirely over with whatever feelings it was he harbors for Eggsy, but it's wrong for so many reasons. Because of Lee. Because he's known Eggsy since he was so young, because he was in a position of power and trust, and finds himself in a similar such position again... Nevermind that it's certainly not reciprocated anymore. It's nearing the middle of term and Eggsy's still only spoken to him when he's called upon in class, and he's often to be found on the quad in the company of one especially well-dressed and handsome young woman about his age. Harry's never deserved Eggsy, and never allowed the alpha to see any interest on his part, but that doesn't mean it doesn't sting just a bit seeing him choose someone else. 

It's nearing Christmas break, and with the colder weather and approaching holiday, Harry finds himself fighting an increasing sense of loneliness, even if all of it was his own doing. It wouldn't really be appropriate to wear it to class, but Harry still has an cherishes the scarf that Eggsy made for him all those years ago now. It doesn't smell much like the alpha anymore, much to the older man's disappointment, but the thought of Eggsy spending hours working on it, fingers carefully pouring over and caressing the yarn with each stitch is more than enough for it to be treasured. He carries it with him in his bag and wears it whenever he leaves campus for the day instead, well after the young alpha's class and Eggsy has gone home for the day. 

He's wearing it as he makes his way through a freshly fallen layer of snow to his car when he spots the young omega woman Eggsy has been spending so much time with engaged in a heavy snogging session against a tree with someone who's definitely _**not**_ Eggsy. 

_It's Merlin._

"You- You fucking wanker," Harry swears, quite forgetting himself as his voice carries across the courtyard drawing some curious looks while the startled couple abruptly separate. "You act noble enough, and pretend to have Eggsy's best interests at heart. You spout all that nonsense about wanting to keep him safe from me, but then you go and steal his omega out from under him?" 

"Harry, you don't under-" 

"No, you don't understand," Harry shouts bitterly, "He trusts you. Do you have any idea how much that means? What I would give to have that back? He cares about you. He is all heart, and this- this is going to break it. You selfish-" Harry shakes his head, searching through his fury for more words, winding up for more, before his breath and thoughts are cut short by an all-too-familiar voice. 

"Harry, what are you talkin' about," Eggsy asks uncertainly, wide eyes unable to look away from the scene in front of him, from the still slightly startled couple being yelled at, to Harry who is far more upset about his best friend snogging Eggsy's best friend than he has any cause to be, and... "Wait, is that-" Eggsy begins disbelieving, unable even to finish his sentence as he raises a gloved hand to point at the navy scarf wrapped around his professor's neck. 


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, be mindful of the tags. I don't want to spoil any of the important plot points by being over-zealous with them, but I have attempted to list any possible triggers, and will update them if I think of any more as this story progresses.
> 
> This will be an incredibly slow burn, so those of you who are here for Hartwin, bear with me it is coming. (Any non-con or underage sex in this narrative as is warned about in the tags is not taking place between Eggsy and Harry.)
> 
> Want a peek behind the scenes of writing these stories? Got a prompt or idea for a fic you'd like to see? Drop me a note on my Tumblr: [afangirlreadsfics](http://www.afangirlreadsfics.tumblr.com)

"What. The. Fuck. Harry," Eggsy blurts out before he can stop himself. He's still rooted to the spot where he's stopped some feet away, taking in the entire scene and putting it all together, when it finally clicks. The older man at least manages to look a little sheepish being scolded for his outburst. Even as some traitorous and utterly stupid part of his brain is cheering that he finally used his proper name again.

"Ya' know for the record," Eggsy continues with a frown. "Just 'cuz you didn't want me and tossed me away, like yesterday's news don't mean everybody else is out to do the same. Roxy's an omega, yeah, but we ain't together. Never hav' been; she's just _a_ mate, not my mate. I introduced her to Merlin an' they hit it off. An' why the hell should any 'a that make a bit of difference to you?"

The young woman, _Roxy_ Harry mentally corrects, takes Merlin's hand in her own and is eyeing the scene in front of them, assessing everything; Harry in particular with a critical eye, leading the older omega to wonder just what and how much it is that Eggsy may have shared about their history with his friend. From the looks she and Merlin are exchanging with one another, and the pointed glances in Harry's direction it seems like they probably have an thought or opinion or two to share, but they're letting Eggsy dictate how this all plays out.

"You two go ahead, I'll catch you up," Eggsy nods towards them. Merlin and Roxy both seem to consider this for a moment before deciding to give their friend his space and privacy. 

"What are you playin' at," Eggsy asks, voice breaking a little under the weight of all his furiously conflicting thoughts and emotions now they're rid of their audience. "Keepin' that thing, and why the hell would you wear it," Eggsy demands pointing once more to the scarf wrapped around Harry's neck.

"Eggsy, I..." Harry begins, but falls flat, words stalling out as his brain seems to have stopped working being confronted by the angry young alpha he's denied wanting for so long.

"You didn't want me. You said so yourself, made it _**very**_ clear," Eggsy reminds him. "Then you show up at the police station when I get busted, offerin' to help and seem hurt when I say no? You fuck off to god knows where for years, and now you're back? No. Just no. Fuckin' enough already," Eggsy shakes his head, voice quickly becoming increasingly more ragged with emotion as he continues.

"You're still hiding your scent and what you are, and everythin', not to mention that thing can't possibly smell like me anymore, so why the hell would you hold on to it?"

"Nah, you know what," Eggsy continues again shaking his head before Harry can reply. "I don't wanna know. Keep the damn thing forever if that suits you," Eggsy decides his words icy. "But don't think just because you waltzed back in 'ta my life, that means I'm lettin' you in again. I can't afford it, can I, not with Daisy at 'ome waitin' and countin' on me. I can't go on this coaster ride with you no more, Harry. I just can't," the young alpha concludes shaking his head.

"Jus' don't wear that around me no more, yeah? Please," he adds.

The earnestness of his request would make the older man drop to his knees and beg Eggsy to forgive him, if he hadn't locked them to prevent it. All the hurt he's caused this poor boy, because he cares for him. He can't possibly tell him how he feels now, how he wishes things were different, wishes that they could start over. He will only hurt him worse, maybe even break him. If he loves him, _really_ loves him, he should just let him go.

"I'm sorry," Harry apologizes just as Eggsy turns to walk away from him. He means it, even though he knows that those two words aren't nearly enough. He can't hope to find the words for all of it, for just how far this is from what he really wanted, for Eggsy, for himself, for both of them. But it Eggsy is turning to leave, is shutting down, and if Harry never has a chance to say anything of any personal import to him again, then his apology will have to do, and if Eggsy doesn't believe him, well, Harry supposes that's his penance for all of this.

"Yeah Harry," Eggsy chuckles, though his laughter falls flat, rings hollow in the chasm now between them. "So am I."

"Eggsy," Harry calls out after the alpha, because fuck if he isn't selfish, and can he really make this any worse than it already is? For a moment it looks like the younger man isn't going to stop or look back. Harry could understand that; it would hurt, but it wouldn't really be any less than he deserves at this point.

"What," Eggsy sighs heavily, not turning around to look at the older omega this time, but clearly waiting for what he has to say.

"I'll get rid of it." Harry offers, even as it kills him to do so. "-the scarf, if you really want me to, I'll get rid of it," he promises. He wants to see Eggsy's face, for a moment he considers crossing the ocean between them in just the few feet the young alpha has moved away but Eggsy's very purposefully not looking at him, and Harry doesn't want to push him into leaving just yet.

"What do _you_ want Harry," Eggsy asks sounding tired. "Christ, I tried- I don't... I don't understand what it is tha' you want from me," he admits frustratedly.

"You tried to woo me once, and I rejected you," Harry manages softly. Eggsy huffs.

"Yeah, we' been over this ain't we, you didn't want me."

"No Eggsy," Harry admits. "Wanting you was never the problem. But you were 17, it didn't feel right wanting you." It hardly does now, Harry's still fighting to tamp down the niggling feeling he's somehow predatory or a pedophiliac for some part having wanted him when Eggsy had it's tried to win him over. But any sense of wrongness is nothing compared to how wrong this distance and frostiness between them feels. Harry would do anything to change it, for a chance to have that relaxed, happy, and safety with one another they once shared.

Eggsy draws in what sounds to be a shallow sort of breath, and hesitates a moment. "But I asked, an' you said-"

"Whatever I could think of to push you away," Harry admits.

"Why," and somehow just that one word threatens to destroy him, because Harry knows that tone, knows what Eggsy's eyes look like, how his lip quivers ever so slightly when his voice cracks like that, even if he's only seen it once before. He'd been the cause of it then too.

"Because I thought you would be better off without me. You were so young, and you had so much and so many better things ahead of you than being tied down to me. Because I was afraid. And I knew if you kept trying I wouldn't be strong enough to keep pushing you away."

"I'm not so young now. I came of age quite a number of years ago now, Harry," he replies finally.

"I know," Harry nods despite the fact Eggsy's still resolutely standing with his back to him, staring off into the clearing parking lot.

"And you never came back 'round," the alpha points out.

"I know."

"You really hurt me," Eggsy admits, voice ever so slightly shakier than the calm and determined attitude he so desperately wants to convey with the older omega.

"I know that too," Harry admits, although he certainly wishes he weren't so aware of that fact.

"So what? What is it that you want, Harry," Eggsy demands exasperated, finally whipping around to face the other man once more.

"You," Harry replies simply, gently taking the scarf and unwinding it from his neck. He holds it between his fingers examining it fondly, one last time. "You tried to woo me once," Harry repeats. "To show me that you knew, understood, and appreciated me, that you cared for- and could take care of me. I know it's not exactly traditional, but if you will let me, I would like to do the same with you."

"You want to woo me," the young alpha repeats looking nothing short of stunned. 

"Please," Harry nods, slowly letting go of his pride and gently dropping to his knees in front of the alpha, offering up the scarf that he'd found so offensive in light of the other's rejection and perceived indifference, in his outstretched arms.

"I ain't an omega, 'Arry," Eggsy whispers shaking his head, staring at him with equal parts confusion and concern. "I'm not looking for an alpha."

"And I have no desire to be one to you, Eggsy," Harry replies with a nod. The younger man frowns ever so slightly. "But I would like the chance to make things right. Let me show you that I care about and could take care of you too."

"If this is ever gonna work, you're going to have to tell me why you'd want to pass for an alpha at all in the first place," Eggsy tells him firmly, and now it's Harry's turn to draw in a shallow, barely there breath. He knows that. Knew it the moment he opened his mouth. And there is no way to tell Eggsy the truth without telling him about Kingsman. Arthur would blow a gasket if he ever found out a knight broke their secrecy, especially to a boy like Eggsy, whom their organization's head has made perfectly clear he sees as inferior. But Harry trusts Eggsy to keep his secret, he just doesn't know how or where to begin, but fortunately eggsy doesn't seem to expect his answer right this minute.

"And you're gonna have to get along with and get approved by Daisy too," the alpha adds thoughtfully. "I know she's just a pup, but she's my pup now, and I ain't just gonna throw her aside- for you, or anybody. We're a package deal." Harry nods frantic- and furiously to show he's listening and has understood all of this, even as he's fighting down his disbelief that he might still have a chance after-all.

"Yes," the older omega agrees instantly. "Yes, okay."

"You can keep the scarf then," Eggsy nods to the item still resting in Harry's outstretched palms.

"I was rather hoping you would keep it, actually," the omega admits softly. "You could scent it, and give it back to me when you feel I've earned it." Eggsy considers this for a moment, before coming closer and accepting the scarf with a small nod.

"But what about the college," Eggsy asks a bit apprehensively, "There ain't any rules about relationships with your students?"

"I don't know," Harry admits.

"You don't know," Eggsy repeats incredulously, with a pointed sweep over the man who's still kneeling, no doubt looking foolish, in an inch or two of snow. "You're asking permission to attempt to woo me, and you don't know if it could mean your job?"

"I wasn't sure you'd even give it a second thought," the omega admits a bit sheepishly, admittedly beginning to feel as stupid as he probably looks at the moment. "I could always find another job, if I had to."

Eggsy shakes his head in disbelief once more. "You really don't care, do you?"

"About my job," Harry asks with a furrowed brow. "Of course I do. I care about it a great deal, and I enjoy it immensely. But-well, despite what my behavior had probably lead you to believe these past few years, I care about you more. And if there's a possibility of having and being with you, at the expense of my job, then I'll find another one, or another occupation that suits me." 

_And yeah, Harry's been thinking about it for ages now, but working through it out loud it's all crystal clear, when push comes to shove, it isn't a lie, if Eggsy will still have him now, after his being a total prat and it came down to it, he would leave it all._

"You make that all sound so easy. That's your life you're talking about, 'Arry. All those years of education, and skill you'd be throwin' away."

"Trading," Harry corrects. "For something better that stands to make me far happier and fulfilled than any job ever has, even as cushy as this one." Eggsy blushes and looks away for a moment. Harry's words are smooth, romantic, and steal the alpha's breath, but not a word of it rings insincere. He will have to wait and see if Harry's actions back them up though.

"You should probably still look into the rules of this place, Guv'," Eggsy replies shaking his head. "'Cause I ain't about to toss aside several months worth of work and credits. I'm too close to bein' able to give Daisy the better, proper sort 'a life she deserves to mess it up now." Harry nods, he doesn't want to cause Eggsy any more trouble. If it all blows up, Harry wants to be sure it's him left with the egg on his face, no matter what the cost.

"I'll find out," Harry promises. "I won't jeopardize your passing my class and graduating."

"You realize if you hurt me again, an' I ain't gonna be able to stop Rox' and Merlin from doin' whatever it is they decide to do 'ta ya, right? -Might even help 'em." Harry nods. 

"Yes, I understand."

"Yeah alrigh' then, now would'ya please stand up; people see you like this, they might talk. Besides your pants have gotta be soaked through by now," Eggsy says gesturing to the melted patch of snow where he's been kneeling.

Now isn't the time to tell the alpha, of course, that Harry would be all too happy to kneel anytime, anywhere, and for as long as Eggsy wants. That he might like nothing more than to kneel and keep the alpha's cock safe and warm in his mouth behind tight lips, working over its length with his tongue, until Eggsy can't take it anymore and uses him until he cums, but now the image is there Harry can't entirely banish it from his mind. He stands and straightens up instead, grateful for the log coat covering the half-hardness the images of that fantasy have inspired, still a bit disbelieving and dizzy that there's now a greater chance that fantasy and so many others could perhaps come true than there was even an hour ago.

"Well, I reckon I better go meet Roxy and Merlin, before they get a better idea than waitin' on me to grab some dinner," Eggsy stumbles through saying, a bit awkwardly. "Let me know what you find out about the rules for this place, an' relationships between students and professors, yeah," Eggsy nods back to the main college buildings, still watching him.

"I will," the older omega promises with a small hopeful smile. Harry watches as the alpha leaves before heading home with as much haste as he can manage; afterall, he's got some homework to do.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, be mindful of the tags. I don't want to spoil any of the important plot points by being over-zealous with them, but I have attempted to list any possible triggers, and will update them if I think of any more as this story progresses.
> 
> This will be an incredibly slow burn, so those of you who are here for Hartwin, bear with me it is coming. (Any non-con or underage sex in this narrative as is warned about in the tags is not taking place between Eggsy and Harry.)
> 
> Want a peek behind the scenes of writing these stories? Got a prompt or idea for a fic you'd like to see? Drop me a note on my Tumblr: [afangirlreadsfics](http://www.afangirlreadsfics.tumblr.com)

"Hey where's Rox," Eggsy asks sliding into the booth across from Merlin when he finally makes it to the restaurant a little while later.  
  
"Just powdering her nose, she said," the other alpha replies with a small fond smile at the corners of his mouth. "I believe she wanted to give us some time to talk."  
  
"Oh," Eggsy managed, furrowing his brows. "Well, that's nice 'a her an' all, but anything I got to say about what happened back there, I'm fine with sayin' to the both of 'ya."  
  
"Actually lad, there's something that I needed to talk to you about," the older man admits.  
  
"Yer making me just a bit nervous here, Bruv," the younger man admits, trying to laugh and lighten the mood that seems to have fallen between them. "What is it?"  
  
"Would I be right in thinking that Harry's finally confessed he's interested in pursuing a relationship with you?" Confessed was an amusing choice of word, but now that Eggsy thought on it a bit, recalling the way the older omega had gone to his knees and begged for a chance, for forgiveness, it wasn't an altogether inaccurate one.  
  
"Yeah," Eggsy nodded, fighting back a smile. He didn't want to get his hopes up yet. There was a lot at stake, and plenty that could still go wrong, but it was hard not to. For all the hurt and time passed between them, Eggsy had never entirely gotten over Harry, despite his better efforts. He might finally have the chance he's long been trying to stop dreaming of with the omega he's always wanted.  
  
"Eggsy, there's something I should tell you, something I should have said some time ago," the older man admits, looking scarily apologetic.  
  
The young alpha listens, despite his instinctive urge to shut down and shove all his walls back up with this admission that someone he trusts has been holding out on him, may have betrayed his faith in them, as Merlin explains that he had been aware of Eggsy's feelings for his friend early on, and cautioned distance, later urging Harry to push the young man away.  
  
"I didn't know you then, lad. Didn't know the kind of young man you were, what you had been through... I saw the rap sheet, and I let it taint my perception of yeh. But after everything that happened, after seeing how badly we'd failed your father, I couldn't just stand by, not if there was a chance I could help. I misjudged yeh. Harry might not have rejected you, if I hadn't-"  
  
"No," Eggsy interrupts shaking his head firmly before Merlin can finish his thought. "I appreciate what you're sayin', but no. You ain't the first to write me off as a pleb, I'm sure you won't be the last. And you gave me another shot, after everythin' even if it started out 'cause of my da'. Harry is his own man, and I know he can make his own decisions. You might be his friend, but whatever it was you told him, he's still the one that chose to push me away and shut me out this long. An' he kept doin' it even after you came around. He's got to answer for that, not you." The older man nodded, looking ever so slightly relieved.  
  
"Well, thank you. It's been an honor and privilege gettin' to know you and wee miss Daisy," Merlin nods with a small smile.  
  
Roxy returns to their table with a smile of her own, placing a gentle hand on the older alpha's shoulder, leaning in to kiss the crown of his head before taking a seat beside him. "So you and Harry," Roxy prompts with something of a small smile. Eggsy does his best to fight it, but he honestly cannot help it, he can feel his neck and ears flushing ever so slightly thinking about the older omega. Roxy's smile gets just a little bit wider, Merlin's own expression never falters, but Eggsy knows him well enough by now to know he's holding back his own amusement. "You're going to give it a go, then?  
  
"Yeah," Eggsy nods, with a slight smile of his own. "I reckon so," he confirms. "He's gonna find out if bein' with me would jeopardize my grades or his teachin' position firs', though."  
  
Merlin and Roxy share a sideways glance that lasts only seconds, but Eggsy is far too sharp, his observational skills honed out of necessity because of the kind of environment Dean created, to miss it. "-Well, that's a good idea," Roxy manages, trying to sound nonchalant.  
  
"Whot," Eggsy asks concerned. "Wha' is it the two of you know about all 'a this, that I don't? I mean I forgive you for the whole tellin' him he probably shouldn't be with some kinda juvenile delinquent an' all that, I get it, and ya' got your head outta your ass about it eventually, but I'm really gettin' tired of feelin' like I'm in the dark here."  
  
"Eggsy," Merlin says, hesitantly. "It's probably a conversation you should have with Harry yourself, but, you know he's- well, he doesn't advertise that he's an omega. In fact, we're probably the only people who know."  
  
"Yeah-" Eggsy nods slowly. "I sorta got that from the whole manufactured alpha pheromones he wears, an' all. I tol' him he was gonna have to talk to me about that, tell me why he was pretendin' to be something he's not. I wan' him, but I ain't interested in an alpha." Merlin nods, and Roxy looks as though she's biting the inside of her lip just a bit.  
  
"An' what did Harry say?"  
  
"Said he wanted me, that he had for awhile- maybe always, but didn't feel right when I was so young last time we knew and saw each other. 'e said he liked and cared about his job, but if it were to come down to it, he'd find a new one," Eggsy continued, still eyeing his two companions. "Why?"  
  
"And he said that he would look into whether or not your being together would potentially effect your credits, or ability to graduate," Merlin asked.  
  
"Already said that, didn't I," Eggsy replies with growing impatience. "Why," he demands once more, a little less gentle about it this time.  
  
"It's not for us to tell you Eggsy," Roxy replies kindly. "But you and Harry definitely need to have a conversation about his work, because being with you- even if it happens after you pass his class, or graduate- it will cost him his job."  
  
"But that's not fair," the young man protests, even as he is aware of just how juvenile his reply sounds. Sure, Eggsy had known it might be a possibility. The university could frown upon the whole thing, suggest that it was a conflict of interest, but where was the harm if the two of them stalled out the possibility of some kind of more intimate and romantic relationship until Eggsy was no longer a student? That had been a more or less rough plan B if Harry came back to him with a less than positive response as to the school's rules about teacher-and-student relationships. "Even if we waited? How can they do that? They can't, can they, I mean that's-" Eggsy stumbles searching for the proper word. "It's discrimination, isn't it? They can't give him the boot just because he's an omega, or because he might have a younger alpha. ...Can they?"  
  
"They can if he lied when he applied for the job," Roxy replies with a small frown. "Like leading them to believe he was an alpha."  
  
"And Harry knows that?" Merlin didn't look happy about it, but didn't hesitate to nod in the affirmative.  
  
"Why wouldn't he tell me?"  
  
"Because he cares about you, lad. A very great deal, and anyone who knows you, knows how caring and selfless you are. You want a public relationship, if he were to be your mate, you wouldn't want to keep it a secret, an' you have every right to want, and deserve that-"  
  
"But.. he said he loves his work. I don't want to be the reason he has to give it up. I don't want him to resent me later for takin' it away from him. I could keep quiet about it. I wouldn't have to-"  
  
"That's why he didn't tell you," Merlin nods.  
  
It makes sense, but that doesn't make it any less infuriating. It isn't a typical very omega-like trait, but Eggsy knows well enough by now that Harry Hart isn't exactly your average omega, it's one of the many things that he appreciates and loves about him. He just wishes that in this at least, Harry could be a little more selfish. It's not as if they haven't been dancing around, waiting, and pining for this for years now. If Eggsy is truly what he wants, as the older man would like him to believe, then he wishes the omega would just take him for his own, to hell with anyone and everyone else and what they might think or say about it.  
  
The waiter comes over to take their order, but suddenly Eggsy just can't find his appetite anymore. Roxy and Merlin seem to understand, and dismiss his apologies when he tells them that he has to go, as if they knew this was coming- which they probably did. Jamal has already agreed to babysitting his lil' flower until late this evening so that he could catch dinner and spend some time with them, so Eggsy finds himself making his way to Harry's. It would be faster to take the tube, he knows, but he walks instead, taking the extra time to think over exactly what it is he needs to say, and how he might best go about it. He thinks that maybe he's come up with it, or at least something near passable by the time he rings the bell, and promptly forgets it all the moment Harry opens the door.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me, if you already knew the answer," Eggsy blurts out before the older man has the time to say anything. "It isn't a maybe or a possibility, is it? It's a certainty. If people knew we was together you'd lose your job." Harry frowns a little, taking a step backwards to make room for Eggsy to walk passed him and into the house, so the alpha does.  
  
"I thought it might be good to have some time to figure out how to tell you," Harry admits.  
  
"I don't want you to give up teaching, 'Arry," Eggsy continues, shaking his head. "I lo- like you. I want you. But you have been teaching for years now, and you're damn good at it. I won't let you look back on your life a few months, or even years from now, and hate me for taking that away from you."  
  
"Eggsy," Harry replies with a rueful sort of smile, and a shake of his head. "There has never been, nor do I believe there will ever be a scenario or circumstance which might entice me to hate or resent you."  
  
"Ever," Harry repeats when Eggsy opens his mouth on the verge of another protest. "I want to be with you. I wouldn't have said something to you after all this time if I hadn't already weighed out the potential consequences and cost, and decided you were worth it." The young alpha doesn't know exactly what to say to that. Harry's smart, brilliant even, to continue to question his ability to make a decision like this is the very thing he had scolded Harry for doing when he had put himself forward as a candidate for his alpha years ago. He has a lot to make up for, certainly, but they will never get anywhere with one another without that initial leap of faith, a show of trust. Eggsy simply has to believe that Harry knows his heart and mind well enough to make the right decision here, that he won't go back on or regret it all later.  
  
"And it's probably about time that you know I'm not a professor."


	15. Chapter 15

"Don't be ridiculous Harry, of course you are," Eggsy replies shaking his head. "You're one of the best, everybody says so."

"Eggsy," Harry interrupts before the younger man can say anything further to argue with him about it. "I appreciate the vote of confidence, I do, but I need you to listen now and believe me. I'm not a professor," the omega insists, prompting the alpha to take a second look at him, and slowly drop down onto a nearby couch. He's being serious, this isn't just self-doubt about his abilities as an educator. The older man takes a tentative seat beside him, making sure to leave some space. This could go any number of ways, but Harry thinks that it would be only natural for the alpha to be upset with him for the deception.

"What I'm about to tell you is an absolute secret, and it must be kept that way, in the strictest confidence, do you understand," Harry asks. Eggsy nods, of course he does, he's never grassed anybody up before, and he's not about to start doing so now, no matter how much he's trying to hide the hurt this man-that after all the time wasted between them, when they finally might have a chance, he's learning has been lying to him.

"Yea' but Rox and Merlin know what's goin' on don't they? Why do I have to be the last one to know," the alpha asks a bit defensive and aggressively. Harry aches. He's hurt him. Just as he's always known that he would, and done his best to keep his distance to avoid doing. The omega wants nothing more than to drop to the floor, to kneel beside the alpha and tend to him, to nuzzle against him until Eggsy understands how much the younger man means to him, that he is the last person on Earth he ever wanted to hurt, and how sorry he is for it. He doesn't know if Eggsy can see all that, reflected in him somehow, but the alpha's voice is a little softer, more patient when he finally manages to ask, "Alrigh' so you ain't a professor. So what does that mean? What are you then?"

"I'm a spy," the older man replies, and for a moment his expression is so serious and unflappable, Eggsy actually believes it, but the idea is ridiculous, and he says as much.

"'Arry if you changed your mind about all of this, about is, you could have just said so. You didn't have to lie about it," Eggsy says finally, a hurt and bitter edge audible in his voice. And getting Roxy and Merlin in on the joke/story, well that was just cruel, Eggsy thought. How had he gotten the pair of them involved in all of this, and why would they have gone along with it? Eggsy thought that the two of them cared about him and his well-being. Why would Merlin have gone to the trouble of apologizing for misjudging him when he had first learned about him, if only to trick and hurt him worse later? Was all that really just to sell the joke? They were his friends, why would they take part in any of this? The answer is that they wouldn't. Which meant that Harry, incredible as it seemed, must have been telling the truth.

"A spy," Eggsy repeats finally, looking up to meet the older man's eyes. Harry looks somewhat relieved that he hasn't bailed yet, and is waiting around for an explanation, but his folded hands betray just how nervous the omega actually is. He nods. "Like James Bond?"

"If you like," Harry nods once more with a slight shrug.

"So when Merlin said that you would lose your job if we were together, public-like," Eggsy continues cautiously. "Did he mean the teaching post, or does this spy organization of yours not take kindly to fags?"

Harry flinches at the slur. It's not the first time that he's ever heard it, not even the first time that he's heard it applied to himself-although he's always been cautious to keep that part of his life very private since- but he's never liked the term. Eggsy doesn't look the least bit phased or remorseful for it's usage, maybe he's still a bit upset about the deception. Maybe he figures if the spy organization the omega works for doesn't like homosexuals that's the sort of term that they would be thinking or using with them.

"Both," he answers softly, ducking his head. "I never disclosed with the university that I'm an omega, which is lying on my employment application, more than enough grounds to dismiss me. And Kingsman- there are others, like..."

"Others that like cock," Eggsy interrupts bluntly when Harry seems to hesitate, searching for the right words he wants to use. The older man bites his lip, but nods in acknowledgement. "But-" Eggsy prompts, encouraging him to continue.

"But our head doesn't like it. He already doesn't much care for me, ever since I recommended your father for a position."

"My Da' was a spy," Eggsy ejaculates, nearly jumping off of the couch in surprise.

"Yes. Or, he would have been at least. He was my candidate for the trials when we were trying to find a new agent to fill the role of Lancelot. Arthur didn't approve of his- background. He's of the mind Kingsman agents should all come from the upper crust, wealthy aristocrats. But your father, he was one of the best we'd seen in years."

"So that bomb-" Eggsy hedges softly. "Where my Da' saved you an' Merlin's lives- that was just the bloody job interview?"

"Yes," Harry nods reluctantly, sadly. "He was one of two remaining candidates left vying for the spot."

"But you're a spy organization! An' you said he was one of the best. Why couldn't you just have taken them both?"

"Several of us wanted to. I tried. Merlin and I were doing our best to convince Arthur, or find some kind of loophole, but..."

"But then he died," Eggsy concludes, dropping his head. The older omega nodded. "That's why we didn't get any of his benefits. He wasn't wif the Marines no more, and he wasn't officially part of your Kingsman yet," the alpha mumbles, more to himself than anyone else, finally putting all of the pieces together.

There's a long and rather uncomfortable silence that falls between the pair of them, and as much as Harry dislikes it, he won't be the first to break it. He's given the alpha information that have forever altered his version of events, the image of his father, of himself. It may take him some time to digest it. He may need more time than they have this evening. It's entirely possible with everything that he knows now that Eggsy won't want to consider pursuing anything with him. It wouldn't have been right not to tell him, and Harry has always had every intention of doing so, but sitting here now in his living room listening to the clock ticking away on the far wall, it's hard to imagine any way he might have delivered all of this any better. Eggsy should hate him. He as good as killed his father for the sake of a fucking job interview. He's lied, he's pushed him away.

"Are you even qualified to teach," Eggsy asks softly, finally breaking the stillness between them, slowly looking up from where he's been staring at his knees to meet Harry's eyes again.

"What," Harry blurts out, because of all the questions, all the things he's imagined the alpha will say to him now, this certainly wasn't one of them, or at least not anywhere near the top of the list.

"When we were talking about- startin' something between us," Eggsy prompts. "I told you I didn't want to jeopardize my graduation, and you agreed with me. So I'm asking, are you qualified to be teachin' our class, or is that just part of your cover? Should I be worried about my credits and qualifications at the end of the semester? What are you even doin' there anyway?"

"I'm actually qualified to teach," Harry replies. "Believe it or not, I didn't always plan to be a spy at a top secret agency."

"Kingsman," Eggsy nods. "That's that posh tailor shop over on Saville, ain't it? So that's a front?"

"Well, it does actually employ some incredibly talented tailors," Harry shrugs. "But let's just say that the suits they make for a Kingsman agent, are something a little bit more extraordinary."

"Like what, extra stain protection," Eggsy snorts.

"Bulletproof."

"No fuckin' way, you're havin' me on."

"I'm not," Harry shakes his head.

 "So... you're a spy," Eggsy says shaking his head, he's sure the older omega isn't actually lying to him now, but it's still a lot to swallow. "So have you ever killed anyone then," the alpha asks curiously.

"-Yes," Harry acknowledges truthfully.

"Are you good at it?"

"Killing people?"

"Yea'."

"Yes," the omega admits. "I've been very well trained to be."

"Do you like it?"

"Sometimes."

"Wow," Eggsy whistles. "No holds barred now you've told me what you actually do for a living, huh?"

"I'm good at lying," the omega acknowledges sadly. "You don't get very far in Kingsman if you aren't, but that doesn't mean I always enjoy it. I have never taken any pleasure in being dishonest with you, and it was never my intention to lie about myself or the exact circumstances of your father's death forever."

"But Merlin and Rox-" Eggsy interjects suddenly remembering. They knew. They'd known well before he had. How? Why were they allowed to know? "Are they Kingsman too," the younger alpha manages a little surprised.

"Merlin is, well I guess you could say that he's Kingsman's version of 'Q' if we're sticking with the idea of Bond for your concept of a spy organization."

"Wicked. Makes sense, the guy's a tech genius." Harry nods with a small sad smile.

"He is. He was a decent field agent once too, but I don't think he's ever forgiven himself for missing the grenade that killed your father either. He's never taken a mission since. Prefers making sure all the agents have every bit of intel and tech they could possibly need." Yeah, Eggsy could see how that would change a person, and the other man had certainly been both grateful for his life, and incredibly apologetic when he had met Eggsy in the hospital and finally revealed how he knew his father and the sacrifice that Lee Unwin had made for him and the rest of the team he had been out with.

"And Rox?"

"Roxy has just been granted a position at the table as Lancelot."

"Lancelot? But that was the position that- so the other candidate with my Da'..."

"Was killed some months ago," Harry nods sadly. Eggsy feels a twinge of loss, which is silly really, because it's not as if he even knew this bloke, but it was yet another connection to his father, and one that he'll never get to meet or learn from now.

"Tha' happen a lot," the alpha asks cautiously. "Agents getting killed on the job?"

"No," the omega shakes his head. "No, it doesn't. Admittedly Kingsman take significantly more risks, and live far more dangerous lives than most, but there's no room for slouches, or rookie's mistakes. Whoever killed him was definitely equally skilled, incredibly dangerous, and for some reason-" Harry hesitates. Because telling the young man about what he actually does for a living, well it's one thing. If there is to be any chance of maintaining a genuine relationship with him, whether it is only friendly now, or there may still be the possibility for something more, he has to come clean about his career. But giving him any specifics about his current mission? It's a significantly higher risk. Too much information could be dangerous.

"And for some reason," Eggsy prompts him, clearly not about to let that dangling thought go.

"And for some reason," Harry picks back up, deciding that perhaps just this little bit of information may be enough to satisfy the young man's curiosity about what he is doing at the university. "They were interested in Professor Arnold- or perhaps his work."


End file.
